Confused to say the least

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2004
Confused to say the least
1
Sat, 05-26-2007 - 8:04pm
Ok so I have posted the other day about my rollercoaster marriage, again we are seperated, I had to meet him at the bank to sign the Income tax return, that he already said he cashed but they wouldn't let him...LOL... So we walk out of the bank and he says, can I take you to lunch....OMG what is up with that, he moved out because he says he doesn't love me anymore... I said No thank you... he said I bought you something for lunch and you will really like it... I said no thank you... He said I got you a sausage pepper and onion sandwich from the boardwalk....I said no thank you (I wanted that darn sandwich)lol...so he did his small talk, I said to him Look me in the face and tell me you don't Love me anymore... He put his head down and said Deep down I do but I have to be on my own.. You are better off without me, you will be happy... I said oh yes look how happy I am now.. then he talked to a friend and said I deserve someone who will be there for me all the time, and he cant....So then why can't I let go.... I know I should we have been through this 3 other times, and twice when we where seperated he had a sexual realtionship with another women.. and I even took him back...How stupid am I... I can't let go, I look online to see where he is, I have men ask me out, I just cant... how long will this take to let it go and not be obsessed with him.... Love is not only blind it is stupid....Because I sure feel that way now. What should I do to help myself along to get out of this rut... thanks for all your help
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2007
Sat, 05-26-2007 - 8:39pm
I can't give you advice but I want u to know, you aren't alone. I have been doing this 14 years and although I am the one who said we needed to end this marriage I still find myself wondering if it is the right thing to do. My husband is a sex/love addict, he is never home due to the military so this makes fixing the problems pretty difficult. I have tried everything and now the last thing I can do is go back home to France with our kids and start over although my h says he still love me. Well, guess what? I am sitting here FORCING myself to try to move on with the plan! This after 14 years of good but alo VERY bad times. So no you aren't alone.I keep on telling me I'll get a sign that will let me know what road I should take...the signs have come for France and I am still waiting for more signs.....I guess some of us are slower than others.
When u know how to move on, let me know.
Good luck
lydia