We did MC for a few months, but XH wasn't invested in the process. We'd get 'homework' but he never did it. He said all the right things IN counseling (i love her and don't want to lose her, she's the love of my life, i want this marriage to work), but outside of that office, he still treated me with utter disrespect. I started going to IC and that helped me more than anything. It made me work harder at the marriage in spite of his lack of trying and it helped me sort out my feelings and prepare for the inevitable divorce.
We were in counseling for a year, and it was going wonderfully. We'd never had such a good relationship & were trying to conceive. Then after a romantic, amazing 2 weeks in Europe he comes home & says he wants a divorce. He agreed to go to 2 more therapy sessions, then said he was done. I am distraught over it (a month ago) and still can't grasp it.
Unfortunately, when most people seek out marital counseling, the relationship is already very damaged. It's too bad we don't go to counseling to keep our relationships happy, instead of fixing them once they're broken ;)
Through marriage counseling, I learned I needed to end my unhappy, unhealthy marriage. I felt very empowered and learned a great deal about myself. So no, counseling didn't save my first marriage, but it helped me save myself.
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I think it's worth trying, to say you've tried everything.
For me it was.
We went to two joint sessions.
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~
We did MC for a few months, but XH wasn't invested in the process. We'd get 'homework' but he never did it. He said all the right things IN counseling (i love her and don't want to lose her, she's the love of my life, i want this marriage to work), but outside of that office, he still treated me with utter disrespect. I started going to IC and that helped me more than anything. It made me work harder at the marriage in spite of his lack of trying and it helped me sort out my feelings and prepare for the inevitable divorce.
~calla~ mom to rosie and gracie
We never went to MC though STBX asked me several times.
Emom13
Unfortunately, when most people seek out marital counseling, the relationship is already very damaged. It's too bad we don't go to counseling to keep our relationships happy, instead of fixing them once they're broken ;)
Through marriage counseling, I learned I needed to end my unhappy, unhealthy marriage. I felt very empowered and learned a great deal about myself. So no, counseling didn't save my first marriage, but it helped me save myself.
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