Divorce and parenting plan

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-11-2011
Divorce and parenting plan
Mon, 07-11-2011 - 2:42pm

I have primary custody of my 5 year old son.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Mon, 07-11-2011 - 10:35pm

If your son is 5 then I assum he is going to be in at least kg in the fall--and after that at least will be in school.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Fri, 07-15-2011 - 9:11pm
How about "reasonable visitation"? Could your ex just ask you prior to picking son up if it's a good time? No structured visits, just when it's a good time for him and your son? As long as he called and gave you advance notice would that be a problem?
Community Leader
Registered: 08-25-2006
Mon, 07-18-2011 - 2:28pm
First I have to say I think it is wonderful your xH is thinking this far ahead and wanting a schedule he knows he can adhere to.

At 5, I don't think I would worry too much about which two days a week he sees dad, but you are correct that if you are paying for a sport or activity during dads time it is important that he gets there.

Are these activities you both agreed on? And did dad agree to transport on his days? I ask, because one time my xH wanted my DD to participate in an activity that I felt was unecssary and very hard for either of us to provide transportaiton for, so I refused to comit to transport her. Not saying I wouldn't, but I would not sign the parent slip stating "the child must not miss one single practice." Anyways, that is why I ask.

As your DS gets older though, consistancy will be helpful if at all possible. But on the other hand, the inconsistency could become the norm for your son and if you xH always knows his schedule that far ahead, it may be just fine.

There are alot of people with jobs where the schedule is done weekly, so the inconsistency BECOMES normal. And if your xH has a schedule, then it really isn't inconsistent. KWIM?

Enough babling out of me. I hope something in there was helpful.