Do they ever get over it??

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2003
Do they ever get over it??
4
Wed, 01-31-2007 - 6:59pm
Perhaps this is the wrong place to ask this question seeing as most of us are still in the process... but, after meeting with the mediator STBX is really pissy again. I can tell by his attitude and what he's saying that the mediator has said something that he doesn't like. Every time another person tells him that he is going to have to pay child support and spousal support he starts to punish me with his words and behaviour. It's really annoying. Do they ever get over it?? I'm so sick of his victim/punisher stance.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2006
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 9:21am

I don't know. But I feel your pain. I have a feeling stbx will forever try to punish me for putting him through this.

Then again, he always liked to punish me. I was such a bad wife. (sigh) Even his mother told me his behavior was harsh, but sometimes I did things to cause it.

Whatever. I digress.

I do hope they get over it eventually. He's been eerily quiet lately. I wonder what he's been up to. The silence will end soon though. I signed the divorce complaint on Tuesday. When he gets it I'm sure it will get ugly again.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 4:19pm
Perhaps he will... perhaps he won't.

Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2003
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 11:34pm
Well, I have no doubt that he will gripe and complain and play the victim forever. I will always and forever be made out to be the bitch. I'm ok with that. My issue is when I actually have to deal with him directly. I'm just sooo sick of the verbal abuse and threats! But, all in all, I guess that the bigger question is not about whether or not his behaviour will imporve, but whether or not I can grow enough to not give a crap anymore when he does start acting up... I can't change him, I guess I'd better focus on changing myself.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 02-02-2007 - 9:41am

My EX was like that... so I just had contact with him only when I had to, and then, I tried to really limit it.


When he'd call (if the kids were with me) I'd let the call roll to voice mail.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~