Dropping bombs through a text message...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-14-2005
Dropping bombs through a text message...
2
Wed, 07-25-2007 - 9:10pm

it's crazy - today i received a text from possible soon to be ex that said he was offered a manager position in Philidelphia - we live in NC - hmmmm...how crazy is that - we are in the midst of counseling - reconciliation is possible, yet unlikely - depending if any progress will come from counseling - however if he were to take it - all bets would be off - no way i'm going to do a LD relationship w/him - nor would i even contemplate a move like that w/him & the instability that he seems to bring (seemed like he went into auto pilot everytime there was a problem & he would pull the divorce card)...

i couldn't imagine if he took it - our twins are almost 3 - i can just see them back & forth, a year & year there -honestly couldn't imagine how hard that would be on them & us -and to send it in a text b/c he was in training? what an absolute idiot - and to think i would go back to being married to him - what the hell?? ;(

Laurel

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2003
Thu, 07-26-2007 - 9:22am
That's a really crappy way to convey that message. Maybe a long sit down meeting explaining how that made you feel and your position on the matter would be beneficial? It often happens in these situations where an extenuating factor pops up to make us really examine where the relationship is going. I hope everything works out well for you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-14-2005
Thu, 07-26-2007 - 9:31am

Thx. Yes you are right about the communication factor - something I know I could've did a better job of during the marriage...that whole teaching people how to treat you kind of stuff.

That's the thing about all this technology & writing stuff - b/c you don't hear tone in a voice or see body language w/someone - you can really be off the mark w/stuff just written in words.

I did talk to him later & he said he was declining the offer - not sure what the consequences of that could be & not exactly sure why - maybe that's why he text me w/the info - he wasn't taking it too seriously? hmmmm... Still tho, the topic has came up before tho w/his job & it's a little unsettling - it's a large company & if you want to advance, often that means moving - and w/kids & desiring stability for them, that can be a tough one.

thx again :)
Laurel