Feeling bad - weekend nights are hard

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-23-2003
Feeling bad - weekend nights are hard
8
Fri, 09-15-2006 - 11:04pm
Hello,
I just started the divorce process. I really loved my H, but he wasn't available emotionally for me. He can be blaming, critical and generally hard to live with. A couple of years ago I caught him online dating. Although he said nothing ever happened, I have had a hard time trusting him. Despite all this, I loved him and still do. I know I have to divorce a man like this but it is still hard. I don't have a lot of friends and family, but the few I have are pretty supportive. And we have a toddler together, so that makes me happy. MOst days are good. I am busy. But sometimes on the weekend, especially at night, I get sad and lonely. I'm scared about the future and disappointed about the failure of my marriage. I'm just hoping things will get better. I hope I can make friends and feel close to them.
Just have to get it out,
Kelly
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2006
Fri, 09-15-2006 - 11:26pm
Hi Kelly: I can completely understand what you are feeling. Divorce is not easy, and as women we need to feel more emotionally secure with ourselves and also be able to talk about our emotions. I am sure that you are making the right decision and that you know what is best for you and your child. There are nights which are hard and nights which are easy, but always rememer that you are not a failure, you gave it your all and he just didn't reciprocate. Just remember to stay strong and that we are here to listen to you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-23-2003
Fri, 09-15-2006 - 11:54pm
Thanks for responding. I really do feel like I gave it my all. I wasn't perfect, but I really really tried hard to make things work.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sat, 09-16-2006 - 2:02am
Honey, you arent alone at all. There are lots of us in all stages of the process.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-23-2003
Sat, 09-16-2006 - 5:58am
Thanks,
I really could use some time alone. I work full time and my daughter will soon be three, so, like everyone here, I'm pretty busy too. BTW, I saw the photos of that Greek boyfriend you posted. He really is gorgeous, but I'm sure you noticed :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Sat, 09-16-2006 - 8:06am

Kelly, I know exactly what you mean. Somehow, things seem OK on weeknights, bu weekend nights are hard because we know we have more unstructured time to fill. And, since many of us are on a tight budget, it's not like we can plan endless fun activities to do!


I always found posting here very helpful. It really made me realize I wasn't the only one feeling lonely and low. I would also try to find one goal to accomplish over the weekend, even if it was something small, like going for a walk on the beach, or doing some shopping for a special meal. Hang in there....I hope you're feeling better today.


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2006
Sat, 09-16-2006 - 8:15pm
I caught my STBX online dating, too. He is an internet porn addict and just simply can't be trusted. He has had a couple of episodes with illegal drugs. I am waiting for him to move out. Right now, I just hate having him here.
I agree, I love the weekdays because I am busy with work and I don't have to think about this huge mistake I have made. We were married two years. I thank God, I am getting counseling through this. I just need to find a lawyer now and get him out of here.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2004
Sun, 09-17-2006 - 1:28pm

I am in the same boat as you. It has been almost two years since my Divorce and I still find myself so lonely on the weekends I don't have my kids. I find it hard to even get the motivation to get up and do something. Hang in there.....it will get better.

Kimberly

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2006
Sun, 09-17-2006 - 4:21pm
Hi Kelly,
I'm just 4 months separated and living alone. It was tough for me at first, too. But, I realized that being lonely when I'm alone is better than being lonely with my husband. Also, I finally have control of the remote! Things will get better with time. Good luck to you.