GAL report

Avatar for susieyippin
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Registered: 05-07-2003
GAL report
5
Fri, 08-04-2006 - 1:09pm

Just came from my lawyer's and the GAL report says:

"STBX stated that the pending divorce is probably the result of 'the beer'... and estimated that he would drink a case of beer a week... one day have one or two beers, another day four or one beer." LOL What and underestimation!!

"STBX... often passed up fishing trips with his friends to be with his children..." Didn't stop him from drinking on the job or at home, or to go drag racing, or sit on his butt watching the Pats and screaming at me to keep the kids out of his hair.

"STBX stated that Susieyippin continues to be unemployed, and that her chair caning business is only producing one chair a week... he felt that when the children were in school she should have got a job to assist witht he finances..." LOL again. I worked part-time jobs so I could be home with the kids, and in the year before my youngest was ready to start kindergarten, I became ill with fibromyalgia and severe chronic fatigue. Despite this, I worked for our storage business, operated my own business... sometimes I do one chair a week, other times I can do 3 or 4-- ti all depends on the type of chair. Idiot. And I've always contributed to the finances.

"STBX stated during the marriage, susieyippin often appeared she could not handle the boys, especially ona full time basis during summer vacation... would frequently call him to come pick up the children..." Last year, DS started taking Adderral... until then, he'd been unmedicated, and EXTREMELY difficult to handle. On top of that, STBX had always told the kids, "If you're home, and don't *want* your mother to give you any chores, make yourself scarce..." So, when I'd try to get DSs to do even minimal chores around the house, they'd have a fit, take off for their father's place, or call him and say how mean I was being.

OK, so the investigating officer contacted the counselors. Here's what they reported:

DS's Counselor:
"STBX was allowing DS to drive... did not grasp the severity of DS's issues"..."she would have to recommend DS physical custody of DS be with his mother"...

Family Stabilization Team:
""Susieyippin is very forthcoming with information that is helpful for DS... a responsible parent who uses good judgement in how she handles not only DS but herself..." "she found STBX to contradict himself, as he is either not telling a whole story or as if he has not paid attention...he showed poor judgement in allowing DS to drive a car... he minimized DS's fire-setting until FST provided him with education."

My counselor:
"Stated that susieyippin is not 'unstable' and has no diagnosis except some depression and anxiety relating to the situation with her husband and his alcoholism and denial"... "she has no concerns for susieyippin's parenting ability... doing a really fine job".

Recommendation:
"If both parties continue to reside in Anytown that they have shared physical custody of DS... if that is not feasible, than it would be recommended for the mother to have primary physical custody of DS."... "All of the professionals involved with the Yippin family have no concerns with mother's parenting ability... however there are some concerns with father's ability to provide consistent structure for DS, especially pertaining to close supervision and the issues of his fire setting."

I like this part the best:
"Mr. Yippin could benefit from counseling to address how his alcohol abuse/misuse has impacted on the family, and follow through with any recommendations for further treatment".

EDIT: I just saw this!
"CORI-- STBX's CORI is available through the probabtion department. Susieyippin does not have a criminal record." WTH is THAT supposed to mean?? I just called my lawyer to aske her what's up with that... could STBX have a criminal record? I looked up CORI on the Internet, and it stands for "Criminal Offender Record Information".




Edited 8/4/2006 1:18 pm ET by susieyippin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
In reply to: susieyippin
Sat, 08-05-2006 - 2:07pm

Criminal record... hum!


The other part that I find interesting is that on one hand he's complaining because you don't work more.... yet he complains that you can't "handle" the kids full time during the summer.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

Avatar for eatatmoms
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Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: susieyippin
Sat, 08-05-2006 - 3:01pm

Susie it sounds like things are moving in the direction they are supposed to. I too am curious what your stbx's CORI is. Hmmm....

Melanie

Avatar for susieyippin
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Registered: 05-07-2003
In reply to: susieyippin
Sat, 08-05-2006 - 3:32pm

Hi Karen,

Yep, more contradictory BS from STBX... At the time, I was not only chasing after DS who had undiagnosed ADD and Sleep Apnea... driving 60 miles to work every weekend for my aunt, uncle and STBX's brother cleaning cottages in a resort area... running around doing work-related errands for STBX because he couldn't be bothered to
A. Get a cell phone, or
B. Set up the answering maching I bought for the business, so either he or I were chained to the office...
Working on chairs... PLUS the usual mom-stuff... and doing a major paint job myself at our home... I'd scraped all the popcorn ceilings and repainted them, stripped and sanded the millwork in 6 rooms plus 2 bathrooms, including windows and repainted all the trim, repainted every room in the house at least 4 times since we bought the house 16 years ago. I did all the laundry, cleaning and shopping for the family, as well as Xmas cards, birthday stuff... I guess that's not contributing to the household. (And he wonders why I didn't want to go out and play baseball with him and the boys! I was too exhausted!) Then, after we started the storage business, I did 99% of the work for that. Like I've always "joked", I'm too busy to have a full-time job (paying job, that is).

Also, I don't think he'd know what to do if I was truly unavailable, working full-time for someone. He's gotten used to just having me run his errands to the bank, PO, or whatever, delivering parts to customers, or booting up their storage info on the computer. In addition to being at home already if the kids were sick, or needed to go the doctor's appointments. If I HAD gone and gotten an outside the house job, then who would have taken the kids to their appointments? It's just more of his passive-aggressive way of taking his jealousy out on me.

In one month while STBX was still at home, my paltry "one chair a week" caning business did $850. in one month. In just 3 years, with my useless one chair a week business added ... 12K to the family income (I've been doing chairs since 1986). Not a king's ransom, but more than nothing. And I did all this with severe chronic fatigue. (BTW, I did 3 chairs this week, which is $255.00).

Avatar for susieyippin
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-07-2003
In reply to: susieyippin
Sat, 08-05-2006 - 3:34pm
I hope my lawyer can find that out. I'm sure it was teenage DUIs.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
In reply to: susieyippin
Sat, 08-05-2006 - 9:49pm
Chair caning sounds like the perfect thing to do... at home.... when your DS is home.... and your work hours can be flexible.

Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~