Find a Conversation
|Wed, 09-04-2013 - 7:28am|
I thought our marriage could be saved but I was wrong. We kept talking, he still felt like he needed time to work on his issues. Turns out he's been sleeping with the alleged friend. He promised that he cut off all contact, and then found out a week later that he had just talked to her. Told me it was the first time. I was mad, finally issused him all ultimatum that he needs to either choose our marriage or that friendship. I said some pretty harsh things to him about running away from his issues, etc. the next night he asked to separate. He said he had no interest in being in a new relationship. he told the kids the following night (that was just so angering to hurt them like that). Yesterday I found out that he never cut off contact and I confronted him. He said that he had spent the previous night with her an ultimately told me that he is planning on continuing a relationship with her. I'm sure that it wasn't the first time like he told me. i can't believe thE number of lies he's told me, and still is because he isn't man enough to tell me the truth. He's a coward.
I told the kids yesterday because I didn't want them to hope for reconciliation. I told them that it was over, that dad found someone else he wants to be with and it's not me. i think my oldest is the only one who really understood. When he talked to him on the phone last night, all he asked is whether I said anything, not what I said. He couldn't even responds truthfully to one of the others on where he has been staying. So cowardish.
im pretty numb right now, so angry, sad... Working on getting us all into therapy. Trying to figure out my next steps and what I need to do to protect myself and my children. He won't answer my questions on why he had to keep leading me on and couldnot just end it. It's just so cruel. I can't believe he had the nerve to tell me he still loves and respects me. This is not how you treat people you love. I'm so grateful to my family and friends. I feel like I have a huge wall surrounding me trying to protect me. I just wish my family was closer so I could hold them physically close. Trying so very hard to keep it together. At least I'm not in limbo Anymore. Is it wrong to hope that he bitterly regrets this one day, that he realizes how awful of a husband he's been to me. I deserve better, and he was never good enough for me.