Getting ready for divorce
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Getting ready for divorce
| Tue, 04-18-2006 - 12:58am |
I am new here and new to divorce. My husband of 2 1/2 years and I have decided its not going to work and I am filing for divorce. But he keeps calling me and starting problems. He calls and tells me he has girls at his hotel room and that he is going to start dating soon. This is just stuff that is hard for me to hear I love him with all my heart and dont even want to be going through a divorce. But he doesnt listen to me he is stubborn and so am I but he is very selfish and has to always have holidays with his family and not mine. He has tried unsuccessfully for the past 3 years to isolate me and get me away from my family. I am so hurt and confused by his behavior one minute hes saying he wants to work it out and i get excited and think maybe we really can and then the next minute hes telling me i am stupid and i have brain damage and just being plain mean any advice or encouragement would help oh and we have 2 kids together they are babies and he gets mad at me for not waking up in the middle of the night to take them to the hotel where he just had a girl to see him when he is drunk... advice please....

Holy cow! You are well rid of him! He sounds dangerous. I would get caller ID and not answer the phone when he calls. Seriously! If you have visitation set up he should see the girls then and only then if you are concerned he is drinking or anything else inappropriate.
You are going to have to be tough not to let him bait you with these things he says deliberately to hurt you. If this is the best he can do let it go and be HAPPY he is with those other girls instead of you.
I wish you the best of luck in managing a relationship between him and his kids.
Susie
All I can tell you, all emotions aside, is run like you stole something.
Peace,
Di
***If you cannot define yourself, your circumstances will.***
Your STBX is trying to emotionally abuse you. And I know how hard it is to hear things about other women when still care about someone. I know this is going to be hard, but I would suggest having as little contact with him as humanly possible. Since you have children, you obviously have to stay in touch. You much want to try and schedule a weekly phone call, and adhere to that. If he is unable to stay on topic, hang up. If that doesn't seem to work, the next option is e-mail contact.
I know this is all easier said than done, but you are being horribly mistreated. No one deserves that! Remind yourself of that.