Gifts for dd from OW what to do?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2005
Gifts for dd from OW what to do?
4
Mon, 02-26-2007 - 5:00pm
The ow sent home a couple of outfits and toys with dd. First why would they send this crap to my house and tell me that's where it from. Second stbx made dd give the girl a hug for them. Third I have three other kids that got nothing.

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2006
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 11:40am

gal_power,

I find your post a little heart breaking, for your DD's sake.

I am divorced with a son, and have since remarried a man with children, so I feel I have a well-rounded perspective.

The clothes and toys for your DD were not a smear against you, but a gift for your DD. I think it is sad that you threw them away. It could be MUCH WORSE. Your children could be forced to endure a step parent who has no affection for them.

You will most likely meet a man with whom you become serious, and your children will be fortunate if he cares enough about them to be kind to them.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-31-2004
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 1:58pm

I might have done the same thing... don't beat yourself up. It's a process. We all take 2 steps forward only to take 4 steps back in anger. I can relate to the anger over the OW. It my STBX had some OW around my DD, buying her gifts... I don't know. That would be very frustrating.

What is up with this OW anyway? Does she not have kids or have a clue? What is her motive for buying your DD the gifts? Sounds like she is just trying to impress her and not thinking about the big picture.

hang in there!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2005
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 2:36pm
I don't know what's up with her other than wanting to buy dd. I did pull them out of the trash wash them and put them in a bag to take back to stbx. Once the anger passed I realized how childish I was acting. I am going to try and act like an adult form now on. I did tell stbx that they need to keep the things they buy at their house.

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 3:04pm

That's a tough one!


I do think it's important to be fair to all the kids, but I don't always buy both of my kids something at the same time, either.


My kids do bring things home from time to time, and not just from OW--their new step-mom, but other family members... that don't really suit their personality.... but usually we talk about it together and either try to exchange it or donate it to a charity.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~