A good ending....

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2006
A good ending....
5
Sat, 09-09-2006 - 7:32pm
Hello all. Although I've been lurking for a couple weeks this is my first post. Here's my story. My husband and I have been married 8 years and we have a 17 month old daughter. Three weeks ago he came home from a trip and tells me he's not 'in love' with me anymore and wants a divorce. We've had our share of problems, but I wasn't prepared for this. On top of it all, last week he had a change of heart and asked if he could come back home so we could try and work it out. Of course I said yes. Well, after 4 days he decided he didn't want to work it out and left again. During this entire time he's been talking on the phone and texting his new female "friend" that he just happened to make on the business trip he took prior to coming home and saying he wanted a divorce. Now here I am; heading towards a divorce, 30 yrs old with a toddler and no family or friends close to where I live. Bottomline is I'm lonely and scared. Does anyone have a "good ending" story close to one like mine? I could really use an example where things worked out for the best. Right now I don't see much light at the end of the tunnel. Thanks for your support.
Avatar for eatatmoms
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 09-09-2006 - 7:39pm

Mine did work out for the best in the end - I finally decided to divorce him and I'm happier now then I EVER was in my life.

When my children were 3 and 6 my ex met someone else and although she wanted nothing to do with him, it sparked in him a feeling that made him believe he never loved me. It's a long long story, but it ended up being us working it out, then a couple years later seperating, then him coming back and then a year later we finally seperated and filed for divorce. It was a LONG time coming, but let me tell you, the first major time the rug was pulled out from under me I was terrified. I had such young children, I was 31, had no college education (I put him through school), no job etc. I remember telling my mom I had no idea how I'd get through life, I felt so used up by him. Somehow it's all fallen into place and I'm loving life. Good luck to you.

Melanie

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-05-2004
Sat, 09-09-2006 - 8:06pm
Hi,
I don't have a good ending story, but my story is very similar to yours and I can relate to you 100%. My husband did the same thing, he told me he loved me, but wasn't "in love" with me. I am only 25 years old and we have a 3 year old and 10 month old , and we have been married 4 years. I was completely heartbroken , he did come home for a few days, but one day he never came home from work and he has been gone since. He comes to see the kids everyday and gives me money. I found out he has been seeing a woman from work for awhile now and that explains all the phone calls and text messaging he would do. I can't believe he has done this to our family. We had our problems, too, but I never thought this would happen to us. He has yet to file for divorce and he plays mind games with me, and never really comes out and says what he wants. He admits to me he messed up really bad. We both have lawyers and Im planning on filing for divorce next week. Just try to be positive, you will get through this. You dont need a man like that in your life, you deserve better.
Kate

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 09-11-2006 - 4:34pm

Hi there.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Tue, 09-12-2006 - 1:23am

I have a really good ending story!


I filed for divorce from my ex 3.5 years ago, took him back, only to divorce a couple of years later. I was completely convinced I'd be alone forever, I never believed I could have a happy, healthy relationship....but it all changed ;) I met (or actually re-met) my fiance, and we're getting married soon. He is a wonderful man, and I honestly never knew how sweet love could be. I know it sounds a little sappy, but it's true. If I'd stayed married to my ex, I am honestly not sure I'd have survived. The divorce turned out to be a blessing in disguise for me.


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-23-2003
Tue, 09-12-2006 - 9:36am
Christine,
I haven't heard your story and was just wondering what made you take your spouse back, only to divorce later. I hear that story a lot. I ask because I always question whether I should give my STBX another chance. But I really don't think he would make any permanent changes.
Kelly