Haven't done this in a while...

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Haven't done this in a while...
27
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 8:48am

A couple of months ago, someone started a thread about the positive sides of getting separated/divorced. We made up lists of the "good" aspects of being single again. So I think I'm going to post my top 5!

5. When I come into the house, it's exactly the way I left it - no computer parts on the dining room table, no pants in a pile on the floor, no huge messes, etc.

4. When I do laundry, it's all done. There isn't clothing strewn from room to room for five days straight because it's a "system.

3. When a bill comes, I just pay it, I don't have to chase anyone down and field calls from collection agencies.

2. I don't have to worry about the roar of the car coming up the driveway, and feel sick when the door opens, knowing I will either be mistreated or ignored.

1. I can have frilly, poofy, girly sheets and comforters on my bed, and no one complains about it!

Who is up next?? ;)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2006
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 9:07am

Here are a couple more for you.

1.I don't have to listen to his lies or bs anymore.
2. I don't have to revolve my daily life around what he wants or likes.
3. I don't have to worry about him showing affection or the lack of it.
4. I don't have to deal with his financial instability.
5. I don't have to deal with all the emotions that I would get after seeing him on a daily basis.

:)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 9:18am

Good idea!


No more funky mess in the kitchen or spilled food all over the living room


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

Avatar for mom2maggie
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2003
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 9:27am

My life is better now because. . .

1. STBX is a more active parent now than he was during our last two years together. This has been good for DD and DS and has allowed me time to take care of my personal and professional needs.

2. Although I don’t have STBX’s income, I don’t have his irresponsible habits anymore either!!! I don’t make a ton of money, but I get to decide how every penny is spent!

3. When it’s my parenting time, I spend my time with our kids however I want to and don’t have to get STBX (and his parents’) approval!!

4. My in-laws treat me much better now. They no longer take my cooperation and respect for them for granted.

5. I don't have to hear "there's nothing here to eat" after just spending 2 hours and $200 grocery shopping - just because there wasn't always leftover pizza or Doritos there for STBX to grab and plop his a** down on the couch. - Like it would kill him to eat a piece of fruit once in a while?

Overall, I am no longer stressed out and hurt/angry all the time! I never really realized how angry and sad I was all of the time until I no longer was. My only expectation from STBX now is that he is a good father to our children. He seems to be trying very hard to do that. Now that all the other expectations are gone; my anger, sadness, and disappointment that our relationship is not meeting those expectations is gone too.

Oh this is fun! Editing to add another.

6. Dirty clothes are now found in the hamper! - Our nearly 2-year-old can remember that. - Why couldn't his Daddy?





Edited 3/3/2006 9:31 am ET by mom2maggie
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2005
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 10:52am
Another one: After 38 years of marriage, no one ever knew me without knowing him, which is what happens when you are a couple that long. It is liberating to have new friendships and make plans to go wherever and do whatever. I will travel to places he found uninteresting, or as a workaholic, spent the time checking his email.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 11:38am

oooooh!!! fun!!!! my turn:


1. no more having to deal with his messiness - leaving "stuff" all over the place - dirty plates on the table where he finished eating, papers, toe nails, tissues ----------ick!


2. no more walking into the bathroom and having to first FLUSH the toilet because HE didn't.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 12:01pm
Ditto to everything you have all said... only the bonus for me is that I have met a man who has shown me that not "all men" are this way. This man notices and appreciates when I empty a trash can, or wipe the counter or bathroom mirror, and thanks me for doing laundry when I am there. I am a natural nuturer. I clean by nature, I wipe things up as common sense would prove necessary, etc. Throwing a load of laundry (or 2 or 5) isn't a big deal to me... but knowing that there is a man on this green earth that can, 1. do it for himself, 2. appreciate when I do it, and 3. not make things more difficult by pissing on the floor, leaving butter and crumbs on the counter, empty milk cartons, inside-out socks in the laundry, etc... I have been shown a new world.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 12:17pm

I thought of another one....


talking.... not being heard... and it being OK because, now, no one is sitting there supposedly listening!!!


Karen ~ wildlucky4me


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2004
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 12:21pm

Oh, oh, I have some!! And it definitley starts with,

1. Being able to wear my big old ugly comfy granny panties around the apartment!! No more thongs up my butt! Also in this category is wearing old sweatpants and t-shirts to bed. No more uncomfortable sexy lingerie that he won't notice anyway.

2. Not having to cook!! Heating up a frozen dinner, ordering chinese (which he hates), or just eating whatever I feel like. And then licking the spoon and even the plate if I want!

3. Finding my own style. Not having to compromise on my clothes, or home decor. Getting exactly what I like.

4. Being able to watch my favorite chick flick movies over and over without him complaining. (Same goes for music-Sarah M. on repeat! Good stuff!)

5. Being able to go out with my friends without him giving me guilt trip.

Thank you for suggesting this--it was really fun!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 12:30pm

"Being able to go out with my friends without him giving me guilt trip."


Yes!..... how in the world did I forget about that one!


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2001
Fri, 03-03-2006 - 2:58pm

5. We can eat popcorn and apples for dinner without someone complaining that there's no meat.

4. I can take a long leisurely bath without an adult (who should know better) knocking on the door.

3. When the oil needs changed I just get it done rather than talking about it for 3 weeks and never actually doing it.

2. I don't have to live with a man who disrespects everything about me and lets me know about it on a daily basis.

1. The only hair in the bathroom is MINE!

~calla~  mom to rosie and gracie

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