Having a really horrible day...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2006
Having a really horrible day...
3
Thu, 03-30-2006 - 11:05am
Hello,
I am having such a horrible day because the sun is shining, spring is here and all I want to do is cry! I still can't fathom why and how this could possible be! All I can see ahead is sadness and just wishing we were a family again! How can I get past the just wanting him to come home. I really can't belive this is happening! All I want is to be back to normal...what I thought I had for 9 years! The next thing is to tell the kids...how do I not be so angry at him for leaving us and pretend that all will be ok. When I am not OK! How is it possible that he is OK??? And knowing we may have to move out of our house and have our lives turned upside down b/c of his decision is out of control...and the worst part, I truly love him!!!
Sorry for the rant but I am not doing well over here...and words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated!!!
Thanks~
JNSMOM
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Thu, 03-30-2006 - 11:19am

HUGS!! AT this point, when you feel lower than low, just chalk this up to a BAD day. Allow yourself to feel miserable, awful, sad, lonely, etc. But JUST for today. Make yourself that promise. Today was awful, but tomorrow WILL be better. And take it easy on yourself today. Don't do tons of housework, activities, etc.


I know you still love him. But focus on your needs today, and making yourself feel better. You'll make it through the day, I promise.




What lies behind us and lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2006
Thu, 03-30-2006 - 11:56am

Take things a day at a time, literally. On the days when you feel good get the wheels turning on your new life w/o him. On the bad days work through your emotions the best you can.

It has been a little over a month and a half since my husband asked for a divorce and about a week since I asked him to leave bc we could co-exist any longer. It has been a very hard time for me. I've gone on a rollercoaster of emotions. One day I'm in control the next day I'm wanting to beg him back. The truth is, it's over, we as parents have to pick up the pieces and move on. Feel what you feel but try each day to make progress towards the big goal.

Hugs. I hope this helps some. Incase anyone wants to add me to their messenger I'm always looking for someone to chat with to help the time pass by...
AOL: CMJ0078
PalTalk: LIL_BEE

<a href="http://www.GlitterMaker.com/"><img src="http://www.GlitterMaker.com/created/29175279.gif" width="368" height="127" border="0"
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
Thu, 03-30-2006 - 1:46pm

Welcome,
You will make it through this.

The other posters are right feel what youre feeling exactly when your feeling it. It's been 2yrs for me and when it began I never thought i come to this day where I dont cry over him and the loss. Ive learned so much. Im so better off without him and going through it all I couldnt see it then.

There were times when it hurt so bad I didnt think I'd make to the next day. The nights were the worst. Soooooo long. Now, girl I sleep like a baby unless my little one wakes me up in the night. Ive been where you are and Ive come out on top, made it through the storm as you will too. When people told me as we at ivillage are telling you now I know what youre thinking: the pain will never end. We are proof that it does and will trust us. One time it was so bad, him and I had a huge argument I wanted him to come home and he said it was over, he moved on and I just wanted to die. At that time I had to accept the painful reality that the hopes and dreams of a happily ever after and my family with him was over and not coming back. Honey Ive learned that I wasnt the one who lost out, it was him. I gained, gained my freedom from a liar and a cheater. I wouldnt take the back for nothing in the world now. He is someone else's problem and i know for a fact that a problem is exactly what he is. You cant see it now but I can guarantee that there is so much you will learn from the end of the relationship, dont cry because it's over, smile because it happened. The time you shared was special, remember the good days its okay, dont focus on that it over.

Cry, scream, yell, post here, read, journal and most of all PRAY! One of the posters did a post titled: Wise Words, read it, its so true. I have learned that my ex was in my life for a Reason - to give me my son, and a Season - we did have great times together, Now I will find my Lifetime and when I do that will be my happily ever after as will yours. This is just the beginning of the rest of your life.

Hugs.....