He is so cold, cruel, unfeeling toward
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He is so cold, cruel, unfeeling toward
| Sun, 03-26-2006 - 10:46pm |
me....it hurts so badly. I am crying my eyes out to him...I ask him why? I ask him please not to leave me...please don't do this to our family, to our children. He just stares at me blankly....wont answer me, doesn't even care about how badly he has hurt me. I would have knawed off my own arms before I would ever have caused him this much pain....

What do you mean "caused him this much pain"? Looks like he's the one causing the pain on you! He sounds like my ex- turning everything around so you feel like it's your fault. Don't go blaming yourself for anything...instead of asking why you caused HIM this much pain, ask yourself- why did you EVER let him cause an ounce of pain upon you?? That always helps me when I start missing my ex, I remind myself that I never want to be with a man who makes me feel like everything is my fault. It's a form of emotional control, and I refuse to allow that in my life ever again!
Hang in there...I know it's hard.
Lainie
I know this is hard and it hurts so much. But you may never get the answers that you want from him. The best thing you can do right now is take care of yourself. You can't control his behavior or actions. He will continue to be cold and uncaring, no matter how many times you ask him or yourself, "Why?"
Do you have family support or a counselor? I don't think I could have made it at first without the support of my family, friends, and therapist. Don't be afraid to ask for help or lean on people for a while. Also, do you journal? I started writing down all of the questions I had for my STBX - but I never gave it to him. Also, by journaling, I could look back week by week and see the progress I had made, even if it was small.
Take a deep breath, and be patient with yourself. Better days are ahead, I assure you.
What lies behind us and lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us. - Ralph Waldo Emerson