HELP - ADVICE - XH parenting issue

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-03-2006
HELP - ADVICE - XH parenting issue
1
Tue, 11-28-2006 - 8:13am

This past weekend was my XH weekend. XH would tell everyone that asked that I was a Beaaaaaa*** but when it comes to our DD I would kill. That being said...

After picking up my DD from her father on Sunday it was about noon'ish so my sis and I decided to go shopping and like 6yr do when they talk they just say ANYTHING!!!!

Sooooo.....DD precedes to tell me "My daddy left me by myself when he dropped off GF at work!!!" I looked and her and said "What did you just say?"

"Daddy had to take GF to work and it is so early in the morning that he left me there to go drop her off."

DD has 2 1/2 sibs from his dad and this GF (they are 2yr and a month old) I said "Your dad left you there with your bro and sis all by yourselves?!"

Where he lives to where GF works is on a good not busy day MAYBE if he takes the highway 30 mins round trip!!!

DD said "No my daddy dropped off my bro and sis last night at Aunt ****'s house and I went home with my daddy."

I said"ARe you sure your Grandma wasn't there with you or someone?"

DD said "No mom - I was sleeping and when I woke up daddy was gone but then I fell back to sleep and daddy was there!"

Ok if you were smart enough to take your other 2 kids somewhere else why wasn't our DD important enough.

I was left alone growing up maybe at the age of 10!!! But 6yr!

I know what he will say he will say "No I did NOT." Just like every thing else:

And I will say Oh DD happen to mention that this happened etc....and then he jumps down my throat saying NO It didn't happen or NO that would NOT have been done to her....

Yeah kids lie but this is coming from TWO LIARS who lied to my face about them having a child while we were still married and to the face of our 4yr at the time. I believe my DD any day.

But what if my DD would of said this to a teacher? You know kids talk. I do NOT want my child to get in trouble by her dad because she feels comfortable enough to tell me when something is not right. AGAIN I AM NOT THE PERFECT MOM but I do not leave my 6yr alone in the house to go run an errand!!!

Help me address this to him without ripping him to shreads --- this was told to me on Sunday afternoon and I haven't called him yet because I am still cooling down.

HELP - TIA!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2001
Tue, 11-28-2006 - 3:37pm

Ugh! At least my idiot XH finds a sitter when he leaves the girls! But here's what I'd suggest.....

Can you email him? If you draft a nice email, it'll be easier than a phone call.

XH,

DD said something last week that concerned me, and I just wanted to let you know. She said, "When Daddy left me alone the other morning when he took GF to work....." You know how kids sometimes exaggerate, so I just wanted to check this out with you. I would hope that you wouldn't leave her alone like that for any length of time, not only because something could happen at the house where she's alone, and you could get delayed, but also because it is against the law. In any case, I'd hate for her to relay that to one of her teachers, who, by law, are obligated to report suspected child abuse to authorities and those investigations aren't pretty!!

me.

It doesn't REALLY lay blame or accuse, but lets him know that he screwed up!

~calla~  mom to rosie and gracie