HELP ME - MY EX is IMPOSSIBLE!!!
Find a Conversation
| Thu, 09-01-2005 - 9:39am |
I am 34 divorced for 3 years and have identical twin boys age 10. My ex husband left me for OW and last friday OW had a baby girl. He has moved 200 miles away never has paid child support (244.00 per month -total) he doesnt have a job and his drivers license is suspended for non-pay of child support. He has visited the boys once in the last 3 months because of his drivers license situation. The boys are devistated and do no understand WHY I wont bring them to see their dad...because he tells them if I loved them I would drive them. It takes over 4 hours round trip. This man has everyone enable him and take care of him - his family, the government (welfare,unemployment - whatever he can squeeze, now the girlfriend who is on welfare) I was his enabler for 7 years. I will not - I REFUSE when he contributes nothing to the boys-- he doesnt take an interest in their activities or schooling or anything. I am not witholding visitation - he can visit when he wants but he needs to figure out how to come and get his children and bring them back. He is 42 years old. He needs to get a clue. YES I am angry. He tells me I am a selfish B-tch and that I got what I wanted and deserved (HELLO he had an affair and left me - quit his job and moved 200 miles away and WHO is taking care of the kids) -- in fact I did get what I wanted which was my children and THEY deserve a loving home with a loving mom. I am TIRED of the battle with him. He has his new life...his new baby girl (which he always told me NO WAY would I have more kids???) and lives in a trailer with cars parked all over the driveway in the middle of no where, 200 miles away from his kids, with no job.
Ughhh he is such a LOSER!
HOW do I mentally deal with this for the next 8 years?
I accept that child support wont come in and we are doing fine despite it.
I am trying to accept the sporatic showing up to see his kids and it is VERY difficult. The kids are devistated that their father has abandoned them and wont come to their sporting games, concerts at school, father son day at cub scouts...I mean its HEARTBREAKING when there is NOTHING I can do to replace or fill up that pain they are feeling. I try I really do. I love them so much...I just cannot understand how he cannot.
Thanks for any advice you have...
crying in MN
Lizbeth
| Thu, 09-01-2005 - 9:52am |
