He's stationed in Iraq, can you help???

Avatar for newmommy02_2003
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
He's stationed in Iraq, can you help???
2
Thu, 08-10-2006 - 4:48pm
Ok this may get confusing, as I don't really even know all the facts. This is a friend of a friend situation. My mom's best friend's son is stationed in Iraq right now. His wife (we'll call her Sally) left him for another man. She refuses to get divorced because she wants to money that's coming from his paycheck each month. She was initially only getting a small amount but claims she needs more and has constantly called his commanding officer asking for this money. He (we'll call him Steve) doesn't want to give her the money. Steve says she doesn't deserve it as she is being supported by another man and steve doesn't even know where sally lives right now. To shut her up, and get her to stop calling his C.O.s they Army has told Steve to give her what she wants because she is still legally his wife. She refuses to divorce him. He resides in Florida (and she claims she still does but technically she's in North Carolina) and they don't offer legal separation in this state. He has been told that if he doesn't allow her to have that money they will discharge him and he has accepted that that may happen. He is fighting overseas for our country right now and does NOT need this headache. So I'm trying to find any information I can about how he can get a legal separation or divorce from her without her consent. I know it's sneaky and underhanded in a sense but she WILL NOT agree to anything except getting a monthly paycheck from him. He doesn't want to pay her alimony or anything. There's more to the situation that I'm sure I don't even know but that's the jist of it. If anyone can help, or knows of a good resource online, any advice, anything please help!!! It would be greatly appreciated. You can either respond here or email me at hjjsnell@yahoo.com . Thanks again!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2005
Thu, 08-10-2006 - 4:54pm
Florida is a no fault divorce state. He simply has to file the petition, serve her and the proceedings will begin from there. SHe will probably fight him tooth and nail. He can get the forms for free online for filing at floridalawonline.net. It will cost $20.00 for service of process. and there is a $255.00 filing fee. He can also get legal aid to help him because he is in the military. He probably doesn't make that much and will qualify for aid.
Avatar for virgogirl914
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 08-10-2006 - 7:58pm

Hello,

I'm a soon-to-be former military wife. He can file for a contested divorce. He may be able to do it via power of attorney and he can designate a POA while overseas. If he can't file via POA, he need only seek emergency leave in order to come to Florida to file the papers. It doesn't matter where she is when he files. She'll need to be served and he'll need her location in order to have her served, but she doesn't need to be in the state in order for him to file. He can file and potentially have temporary orders established before she's served and both the petition and temporary orders can then be served simultaneously.

I know all of this as I filed for divorce while my stbx was in Iraq. I filed December 8th and had temporary orders filed with the courts the following week. He returned to the states in late January and was served at that time.

For the record, I filed for divorce because my stbx had a girlfriend (a National Guard member) while in Iraq. His unit knew about her, told him to simply be discrete, and then allowed her to attend his reunion ceremony instead of our children (because if the kids were told he was returning then I might cause a scene with the new GF according to the military). Crap happens on both sides of a war. . .