Hey VM, what have you decided ....

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Hey VM, what have you decided ....
Wed, 03-26-2003 - 4:44pm

What have you decided regarding STBX's planned trip to Europe? Have you talked to him about it? You are in a tough spot for sure. It's way too easy to say the "wrong" thing such that he'll become defensive and take the trip just to spite you. Luckily he can't leave the country with DD without something in writing from you.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 03-26-2003 - 6:11pm
Ohhhh ya VM...meant to post to this before. I would NOT allow anyone to take my child out of the country right now. Things are TOO unstable. Yes, you told him he could before, before the war and everything that is going on, but things change.

Tell him to go--but your DD is not going to go with. Thats my 2 cents!!



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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 03-26-2003 - 7:09pm
I agree.... don't let him take her. Everything's too volatile right now.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

Avatar for aspiringwriterdt
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 03-26-2003 - 10:57pm
If the unthinking so & so does take DD to Europe, one thing you can take heart in is that an airport is the safest place to be right now. Take it from me: I know my airports, and went thru Rome, New York & Paris during the last Gulf War. Security is airtight overseas, even better than here in the US; you know that.

Still, like the rest say, best thing is to NOT let the moron take her traveling this week. I'm not in that business anymore but, hey, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure this out. DD belongs Stateside right now; much safer in fact & feeling.

Hope he does the right thing.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 03-27-2003 - 9:05am
I talked to him and without threatening to deep-6 his trip expressed my concern and told him that a note from the people he's visiting in both countries would go a long way toward making me feel better. He said he'd do that and then asked me for dd's passport. I told him that I didn't know exactly where it was at the moment but was sure I could find it and that I'd look for it as soon as I heard back from the folks overseas. He appears to have taken the hint in stride.

I asked him about it again this morning and he said he'd sent e-mail but hadn't heard anything back yet. He also asked what specifically I was worried about. I'm really not worried about the air travel part of it - the two airports he's using are airtight (to borrow a phrase from dt) but he has this ability to walk into situations without looking and I'm worried that he would be undeterred in his quest to see some sight and not notice that he was walking into a crowd of protesters. Add to that his inability with the language and I think it's a valid concern. We'll see what he comes up with.

In the meantime, I'm working on figuring out what I would do with dd#2 if he decides to go without her. Least of my problems but I like to have a plan.

Thanks for the thoughts, guys. I'll let you know what we end up with.