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|Fri, 09-21-2012 - 11:16am|
I will apoligize now for the long story.
I have been married for 11 years and have 2 children 9 and 6. I found out a little over a month ago my husband had not been paying bills and had gotten us very in debt. I had to go to my mother for a loan to get us out of this. I was so in shock at how bad it was and for how long he had kept it hidden from me. I should have known but ignorance is bliss. He can't tell me where all the money had gone. We both work full time and make enough money for all our monthly bills and yet he was not paying them.
My oldest can be a handfull he is somewhat ADHD or ADD I'm not sure, but if things don't go his way he will cry or want to go home. My husband will call him a baby and tell him he will never leave the house again if he can't get along and fit in with the other kids. I have a tendency to let it go because fighting my son makes it worse. I have told my husband he will never be just like all the other kids and you have to love him for who he is. My husbad has a temper with him which in turn only makes it much worse.
I want to leave my husband I have tried to talk to him about it and he shuts down completely. At first he said if I leave he will dissapear and we will never see him again. Now he says he will never only see his kids every other weekend. I can't see him having joint or shared parenting. Most nights of the week he leaves the house and comes home after the kids are in bed already asleep. He never helps with homework, making dinner, laundry. He comes home and sits on the computer for hours playing games. He said he will never move out of the house.
We rent and I work full time but between rent, babysitting and having to pay loans back I can't afford to move into my own place. I would have to move my kids in with my mom, which she keeps telling me to do because she does not want me staying with him because I am so unhappy. I feel like if I could get enough child support I could stay in the house if he would just leave, but I can't make him.
I am meeting with a lawyer just to see what my options are but just don't know what to do. All I care about is my kids being happy. My husband says he is happy, but I am miserable.