How do you know when?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-21-2006
How do you know when?
2
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 3:50pm
I've only been married for a year and I've been so unhappy the entire time. I love my husband so much, but I see us as just friends. We barely have sex because I'm not interested because it isn't good to me and we can not communicate with each other at all. I feel like we're just growing apart everyday and I'm maturing and he isn't. I've been trying to tell him my feelings for about 8 months now, but he says since I'm the only one unhappy I need to go to counseling alone and he refused to go. But now, this past weekend, I told him I couldn't take it anymore and after a weekend of him partying (saying he thought we were over anyway), he wants to reconcile and go to counseling.
I don't know if it's too soon or not. I feel like it's too late to go to counseling and why should I go now after begging him for so long.
I'm at a loss.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 7:55pm
Try the counseling. What can it hurt? I wish my ex would come around. The counselor may say after a few sessions that you should divorce. Then you know you have tried everything. Hugs, Brenda

Hugs, Brenda 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 8:44pm

There is certainly no harm in trying counseling. If you try it and it doesn't work, you'll be no worse off than you were.


I always think it's a big warning sign when one person doesn't want to go to counseling. If my fiance told me he thought we were having problems that warranted going to counseling, I would run there at break-neck speed! Why? Because I care deeply about the relationship. Hopefully, your H has come around and realizes your relationship is important. Good luck!