How long before you were intimate again

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
How long before you were intimate again
4
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 11:32am

I feel a little ashamed to ask it but how long did it take before you girls were intimate with another man after your STBX's. I always thought I'd be with my ex and now having to go down that road again of getting to know someone intimately again scares me to death You know how nervous and self conscious you can be that first time. Especially when your self-esteem has taken a huge nose dive when there's been an affair. With my ex he knew all my "flaws", I had become like 95% comfortable with him in the bedroom. I'm heavy so Im struggling with losing weight now so I wont be so self-conscious.

The thought of being with another man like that is almost frightening.

It's been 3 months since I was with my ex and while 3 months isnt very, very long, at the same time it's LONG. Hell Im not dead yet. Im a woman with needs, LOL. So just curious, do you wait for another committed relationship which you know can take months, years to get to know someone and even then you never really "know a person", or what about one of those flings that dont mean anything, I've never really been a "fling kinda girl" I've always wanted the family, comittment ya know. What did you girls do.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2003
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 5:20pm

I didn't wait, but I didn't seek it out, either...

Took about a month before I met someone I wanted to have sex with. I saw no need to wait for a committed relationship - just got out of one of those, why put that kind of pressure on myself when what I wanted was to have sex? hehee

I do whatever I want and that's how I like it. I'm careful and safe and if someone is there for my pleasure, I make that clear, too -- avoids misunderstandings.

Since being single I've had a number of boyfriends as well... just depends on the circumstances, how I feel about the person, and what I want for myself.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 5:25pm
Cool, i like that idea! Im single now and can do whatever i want! YEAH!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2003
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 7:56pm

That's the spirit -

Now go have some fun for yourself - sounds like it's overdue!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 06-15-2005 - 10:36pm

About 4 months.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~