Hurry up and wait!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-04-2005
Hurry up and wait!
2
Sat, 03-19-2005 - 8:26pm
STBX informed me that his lawyer had given him the final papers for review and although everything in them is agreed upon by us as far as the kids are concerned etc., he's not going to sign the papers until the very last minute. He's not going to go to the Parenting seminar until the last possible class he can attend before the 90 days is up. And the reason he is doing this? He's doing this to "give me an opportunity to realize that I'm making a big mistake and to change my mind". HA! And having me followed and saying all the things he has said have really worked on me changing my mind. NOT!!! But, I very calmly looked at him and said, "do what you have to do" He was expecting me to throw a fit or argue with him. He was expecting me to demand him to sign the papers. I'm not going to do it. I realized the other day that one of you was right. I've been letting him control me. No more. I'm not defending or explaining myself to him anymore. I don't have to. I'm not going to let him scare me or intimidate me anymore. He can do what he wants to do and drag things along if he wants. I'm going to go about my life in the meantime.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Sat, 03-19-2005 - 8:37pm
Good for you! You can't control what he chooses to do, only how you react and whether you let it get to you or not. Getting mad would not have made him sign sooner, it would have only given him satisfaction that he (once again) got under your skin. You did good!

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 03-21-2005 - 2:45pm

You know.... waiting periods are waiting periods..... and if he chooses to stress himself out by having to remember this and have it hang over his head until the last minute.... then tell him to go for it!


Trust me..... if he has all of this time to take a parenting class, then can't get in at the last minute, whose butt is going to be up a creek in court???????? HIS!


I'd be clear that it's stress that he's adding to his life if that's what he chooses to do..... not yours!


Karen ~ wildlucky4me

Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~