I am new at this and I need help!
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I am new at this and I need help!
| Sat, 03-11-2006 - 12:58pm |
Hi!
I have never been on a message board before but I have just gotten divorced on 12/15/05. I have been going through hell and need to talk to someone, anyone because this isn't going well right now. He was my best and only friend and now I have no support at all. I don't have any family myself and my kids are living with him. It was their choice. I understand that people say that it will get better eventually and it takes time and you have to go through the grief process but it's only been 3 months and I can't get out of it. I don't know what to say but if there is someone out there who could write please do.
Thanks!!!
Sue
I have never been on a message board before but I have just gotten divorced on 12/15/05. I have been going through hell and need to talk to someone, anyone because this isn't going well right now. He was my best and only friend and now I have no support at all. I don't have any family myself and my kids are living with him. It was their choice. I understand that people say that it will get better eventually and it takes time and you have to go through the grief process but it's only been 3 months and I can't get out of it. I don't know what to say but if there is someone out there who could write please do.
Thanks!!!
Sue

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rhea57@sbcglobal.net
I has only been three months...be kind to yourself! Give yourself time. There is no set schedule for grieving.
First, have you been to counseling? I found that helped me immensely. Another thing that helped me was going to the gym. I was out around other people, and it helped me to feel more "normal."
Tell us a little more about yourself so we can get to know you. What do you do for work? How long were you married?
Thanks for writing back! I have found a psychologist and am joining the Y to start getting out.
I was married for 20 years and have 17 year old twins who live with their father so they won't have to change high schools. I am trying to go back to college after 25 years but it has been hard to concentrate. Maybe it's too soon. I live in PA and I am trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up so I'm not sure what direction to head as far as a career. I left college (again) to put my ex through his Ph.D program and I would finish where ever we ended up. The twins came and I guess it's the same old story as a lot of women.
Right now I'm just trying to learn to live alone. Thanks for all the support!
Sue
I'm so sorry :( Please e-mail me whenever you need anything at sshomo1@comcast.net. It is really a mess. Do you have kids? Mine are 17 yrs old. They are with their father so they won't have to move high schools. Please e-mail me!!
Sue
Hi! I sent you an e-mail but I may have messed it up because I didn't hit "send and recieve" after hitting "send". God, computers can be so annoying. My e-mail is: lbaldwin@odscap.com. I look forward to talking with you- ask me any questions you have.
Laura
Girl, dont you worry. It does get better with time as that will seem like little consellation right now but there is light at the end of the tunnel. This friday it will be 2 yrs for me and at times it still hurts. But I am way, I mean WAYYYYYYYYYYY better than I was when I first started out. Wow I remember when it was just three months for me I didnt think I would make it through alive but girl I did and damn it feels good. Im actually glad Im rid of him. LOL. I can laugh about alot of the horrible feelings I had back then. I thought I lost something so wonderful. I didnt. I see him for what he really is and I often wonder what the hell I saw in him to begin with. Other people saw his attitude problems and told me about it but back then 5+ yrs ago I was deep in love and couldnt, didnt want to see it.
I see it now. Honey this is a great support group. It got me through the worst time of my life at the point and Im so much better now. You will get there to dont worry.
Hi Sue,
I'm new at this whole thing too. I'm so sorry that you're hurting-I know how horrible it feels. I don't really have any advice for you (I'm still in the thick of it myself--2 months since we made the decision) but I wanted you to know that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. This is a great place to come to find comfort, support, friendship and most of all-HOPE that things will get better. Or, at least that's what everyone keeps telling me!!
I think the best advice I've gotten so far about this whole process was from a lady sitting next to me on a flight. She told me "Salt cures, honey, whether it's from tears or sweat."
Good luck and keep us posted!
Wendy
WE HAD TO BUSSINESS AN THEY ARE WHAT DESTORED ARE MARRIAGE. I'M GOING TO THE DOCTOR FOR HELP! THE MED HE HAS ME ON AREN'T HELPING. ALL I DO IS CRY. I SOLD THEM BOTH AND NOW I HAVEN'T FOUND A JOB. I FEEL SO ALONE. SOME DAYS ARE BETTER THEN OTHERS, LIKE WHEN I HAVE MY GRANDSON. HE COMES OVER AND STAYS DAYS AT A TIME. IT HELPS ME SO MUCH.
I'LL WRITE MORE LATER IF YOU WOULD LIKE ME TO.
GOOD LUCK
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