I am new at this and I need help!
Find a Conversation
I am new at this and I need help!
| Sat, 03-11-2006 - 12:58pm |
Hi!
I have never been on a message board before but I have just gotten divorced on 12/15/05. I have been going through hell and need to talk to someone, anyone because this isn't going well right now. He was my best and only friend and now I have no support at all. I don't have any family myself and my kids are living with him. It was their choice. I understand that people say that it will get better eventually and it takes time and you have to go through the grief process but it's only been 3 months and I can't get out of it. I don't know what to say but if there is someone out there who could write please do.
Thanks!!!
Sue
I have never been on a message board before but I have just gotten divorced on 12/15/05. I have been going through hell and need to talk to someone, anyone because this isn't going well right now. He was my best and only friend and now I have no support at all. I don't have any family myself and my kids are living with him. It was their choice. I understand that people say that it will get better eventually and it takes time and you have to go through the grief process but it's only been 3 months and I can't get out of it. I don't know what to say but if there is someone out there who could write please do.
Thanks!!!
Sue

Pages
Hi Sue,
Welcome to the board.This is a very supportive group of people.I have been divorced for almost 2 yrs now and have 2 girls 11 & 9. I'm also in PA. Which side of the state are you from? I'm in Western PA. I'd be gald to talk whenever you need to.
K:)
Hey Sue;
I'm new on this board too, but I had to respond;
I know that this process can be extremely difficult (and painful as a %$#@!),
but believe it or not YOU WILL be fine. When I first began my divorce process,
a good friend said "in a year, you'll be a completely different person." I
thought she was nuts, but she was right.
You'll be better than you were before, and I'm sure everyone on this board
would agree. The things that helped me most were writing about it, and talking
to other women who were going through the same thing (but were usually a step or
two ahead of me in the proces) about it. I write at debbieburgin.blogspot.com.
There's an article there about the stages of divorce. Read it. We've all been through
what you're going through. Feel free to email me. I'll lend an ear/keyboard
wherever I can.
Take care of yourself.
db
My divorce was final on the 7th of Dec. 2005 so I too have been divorced for 3 months and 10 days now.I'm a mess too BUT you know what has been helping me?!Trying to see my friends more,counseling(I do that once a week)and dancing my but off once a week at a club.I do cry still about everyday BUT sometimes not as strong...you know?Like when I go to the club...I get sad because half of me really doens't want to be there.I would rather be at home with the person I love(if i had one).Dancing makes me forget for awhile my sadness.I always dance by myself because its like a sense of independance for me.My ex was one of my few best friends BUT there were(are)issues that he doesn't want to come to terms with so I couldn't be with him anymore.I still love him very much.I really didn't want to get divorced but it was either 'just settling' OR dealing with the pain and agony of divorce for hopefully in the distant future to get a new beginning with someone else who appreciates me.I think the 2nd choice is the best for me :)
I don't have kids so I don't know THAT part in what you're going through.I'm sure one of your kids looks like your ex so that doesn't make it any easier for you.Do you get visitation?We have to go through certain stages before we can start to actually live again.I can't remember all of them BUT I know that I'm in the middle of Anger and Depression...gee what fun... :( BUT like I said..some days will be better then others for a long time.I was with my ex for 7 years...met him when I was 23 andgot maried to him when I was 29 and got divorced when I was 30.I'm now 31 and feel lost BUT I try not to think about it too much.I'm losing weight and counting and it scares me BUT when you're depressed...that can happen...You know working has helped me to try to stay focused still on what I want to do as a career in life.I need to try to stick to goals and that helps alot.E-mail me some more if you want!!
Welcome to the board, Debbie!
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~
Pages