I filed...
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| Sat, 02-02-2008 - 7:41pm |
Hello, I am new here at iVillage..I just wanted to find someplace where i could put all my thoughts and feelings and talk with others like me.. I am almost 28, husband almost 30
I filed for divorce from my husband this past Thursday...Now, he didn't hit me, or cheat on me, or anything like that.. But for the past few years i felt ignored and last on his list..He is very immature and doesn't understand..
History-we have been together since high school..The only way i can put it is, i grew up and he didn't. He also likes to spend money but didn't want to work for it.. so he's basically been spending my money.. I make about $40k/year and he makes $200/wk! I wear the same clothes to work week after week.. He's always getting new shoes and jeans...Anytime i brought it up, he just got angry...He was also working third shift, so he was home while i was working and i had no control over his money habits.
His family is very overbearing.. They all rely on him and expect him to do things for them at a drop of a dime. If we have plans, they get angry! He plays on a Dart team with them and that takes precedence over everything else..nothing can happen on wednesdays! The last straw for me was, last month my grandmother died and the wake was 2-4 and 6-8 on wednesday, he came for the first one but still went to darts at night!
I have been trying to tell him for about 2 years how i felt.. I even actually went to see a lawyer and my husband ended up talking me out of it and we went to counseling, but obviously it didn't help..Any time i tried talking to him, he either interrupted me or said "what did i do now"..
He freaked out when i told him..Extreme crying, "i am so in love with you" , etc etc..I was like listen.. you should have thought about this before

Some guys just never grow up.
Its like they are stuck at age 18 and try to stay cool.
It stinks but I have a feeling that you will do well.
Hubby needs someone to explain to him what being a "Man" is all about.
BobK