I lost it....
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| Sat, 10-29-2005 - 8:51pm |
well the kids met the gf today....they went out for breakfast..
I talked to the kids tonight (stbx has them for the weekend) and they told me she was "fun"..their exact words were "she laughs"...They all went out together to get Halloween costumes, I already had the kids...but "they" needed some..earlier today he had asked to go out with me & the kids for Halloween...was he planning on bringing her too???
So I got him on the phone...bad idea...asked him this..he said no, they had party to go to after.."we" only take the kids out til 7:30 anyway..
Then I asked him if the kids did their homework...blah blah..somehow the conversation got onto money (like it always does)..I said he had lots of money could buy the kids whatever they wanted...he said I have no expenses because he pays for the mortgage blah blah
then he says .."another non-productive conversation..you make everything negative, the kids had a good day"..this is when I lost it..
I said of course they had a good day..they met your gf and think she is great because she laughs and their mom doesnt anymore..he said I cant help it if she is happy..
I said (yelled) of course she is happy she is 25 has no responsibilities & makes $50,000 a yr..I was happy when I was 25 too!!
He went on to say how I dont have any expenses..but I said..he has taken 3 trips since he left 8 mos ago..gf paid for one ..he paid for another...I said she got the better end of the deal..and he said..no I really enjoyed going away with her...
what an $%%^#$^$#!!!! I told him so & hung up ..then I threw the phone across the room
Why do I engage him..why do I let him hurt me every single time...I lose more & more respect for myself when I do this...
I think that I want to discuss the kids with him..but is it just an excuse??
I'm so confused & frustrated..
Thank you for listening..I feel better typing it out even

It's like you are setting a trap for yourself.
I have another thought I want to share.
Oh my..... next time, don't talk to him..... come here and type away ;-)
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~