I need a pep-talk!!!!!!!!!!!
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I need a pep-talk!!!!!!!!!!!
| Tue, 07-10-2007 - 9:54pm |
OK. The divorce papers have been filed with the court and now all I have to do is sign them. Any advice on how to get up the guts to actually walk into the attorneys office and do it? I still love him, but he left 11 months ago and keeps telling me he still needs "time" to sort things out before he can put any effort into reconciling. I just don't think I can wait anymore.

Is there a friend who can come with you? Taking someone with you might give you the courage and support you need.
I'm also a big list maker. When I forget why this is the right thing - even though I wasn't the one who initiated it - I make a list of all the reasons it is the right thing and all the good things I deserve (and the kids deserve) that he is unable/unwilling to give. Then I make a list of why my life (and the kids lives) are better or getting better.
You can do this. I wish I could be there with you to help.
One more thought - try to break it down into smaller steps if you can. Don't think about the whole thing.
First think - all I have to do is drive over there. Once you've done that focus on - all I have to do is walk in the door. And keep going until the whole thing is over.
It's funny you wrote that about marriage and divorce not being permanent things- not 5 minutes ago I told my STBX (who is feaking out that I am signing) that if we are going to make it work it will have to be a whole new start. These guys just htink that you are neve going to have enough of all the crap and walk away.
It is very cheesy to say, but the best adviceI have gotten is kind fof an analogy. My frined told Me, "Relationships are like sitting at the dinner table; when you have had enough, you get up and walk away." Kind of makes sense, doesn't it?
I am starting to think these guys are all nuts----then again maybe it is me for picking so many loser sin my life! Thanks for your advice--I often wonder if there is someone else. Well, I guess she can have him! I signed today and I couldn't believe I wa ok. I might wake up not feeling so great tomrrow, but for right now I am ok and that is all that matters- right?
You sound like you have a lot of confidence. I think that's great! At least I know it gets better. Keep it up!