I think he's lied..got my agreement
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| Mon, 08-11-2008 - 2:37pm |
Hi,
This is my first time posting here. I left my husband for another man. My h has been out of the house since last November. He signed over my car to me, left me with the new couch that we just purchased and left me with an older than the hills computer, a barbeque that is ready for the landfill. He took the iPod he gave me as a gift year before last (2006). He bout portable speakers and screen for the family. And he took his bed, dresser(s) and work truck and tools.
I've finally just got the separation table back and I'm in shock and I'm so hurt. He told me that he would see to it that I would have at least 25,000 and it's not even close. It was supposed to be so amicable yet I fear that has gone by the way side.
We were married for twenty five years and until this last little while, we were very happy. Our children are grown and out of the house, thank god. So it really is just between the two of us. I worked out of town for the last seven years so he took care of all the financial aspects of our lives...I don't know what's true or what isn't. We both were the ones to get all the info together for his lawyer....and, as I was still assuming that he was going to be fair...I didn't get any copies or anything. I guess what I need is to hire my own lawyer. I'm so scared, he's giving me a pittance of what he said he would. And to top it all off, my boyfriend is now turning into a jerk and I have no one to hold me and tell me that it's going to be okay. Why me? All I did was fall in love..I didn't lie, or hide or keep it behind his back. I came out and told him that I was in love with someone else and we needed a break from each other.
I'm sorry, I don't know how to make myself sound articulate. I don't know why kind of support I'm asking for. I'm just so scared all of a sudden.
Thanks for listening,
benksa

Benska,
I have two suggestions. First, yes, you MUST have your own lawyer. DO NOT SHARE AN ATTORNEY! No attorney can ethically and fairly represent two opposing sides in a divorce. And that's what divorce is - an adversarial legal action.
So, get on the phone and get a lawyer. Take your legal questions, a copy of the proposed agreement, and gather up your documention (whatever that comprises) and make an appointment.
Two, I strongly encourage you to find a therapist. There's a reason you found another man attractive and there's issues you need to identify and deal with for yourself. Foremost so you can get through your divorce, secondly so you can make good decisions about future relationships.
And I firmly believe that going directly from your marriage into another relationship is foolish. You need to discover who you are and find out how to stand on your own two feet. There's lots of ways to do that and I recommend you start with therapy. Then make friends. Stretch your horizons and find your true passions in life. Any man who comes into your life in the future will very glad you did that!
Good luck.
CL-Wisdomtooth2020
Some commonly misspelled words on this board:
You're = contraction of "you are"; You're going away?
CL-Wisdomtooth2020