I think this is it
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| Mon, 07-30-2007 - 4:40am |
This is the short version. Eloped with DH 14 years ago. All family was against it. Somehow, We made it work. He was a hardworking, sometimes selfish, loving and attentive if it served his purpose. I have always been happy-go-lucky, positive, a hard worker although irresponsible with money. I have a solid career in education.
Two daughters later (7 and 5) I can't handle his negativity, his irrational anger outbursts and the lack of attention to my wants and needs. This May I found out he had an affair. It was short lived (2 1/2 months) mainly because I found out. Oh, I had stopped being intimate with him because our youngest had fallen ill since Oct '06 with rare disease and it took a toll in everyone. I felt that I had no energy to put up with his temper and then be the darling devoted wife he needed!
Have been to counseling, he says he is trying, I guess he is, but Karma is a B>>>! He is on the verge of loosing his job, is in poor health and now it happens I am the sole provider of the house.
I hate my thoughts of walking out now that he is in the lowest of the low, but I have also endured many years of Chronic anger form his part. I asked today for D and I am and was really serious about it. I have been up all night reading this board and feel that it wont be the end of my world. I am a Dr. Laura Alumn (read all her stuff and believe in many of her theories) but enough is enough. Even if we legally separated, this man needs a lot more help than I can provide.
I think he "shields" in my tending to him and takes no charge of his own issues and problems. He is seriously in a state of depression or Bipolar disorder or something!
I love him, but love is definitely not enough to save us. Maybe I love the idea of us and our intact family.
Any suggestions will be greatly appreciated. Just writing this post has helped me clear up my head and sort my emotions.
| Mon, 07-30-2007 - 11:58am |
