Im healing!!
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| Fri, 04-22-2005 - 12:21pm |
My divorce was final December 3rd 2004. Took over 2 years to get there with many many court dates and custody issues.
I was delighted and relieved when it was final...I immediatly sold the home we lived in and took my 2 boys to a new place for a new start.
My ex left me July of 2002 and immediatly moved in with his other woman he had been having an affair with for 6 months. He up and moved 120 miles away from his children. He did show up every other weekend to see them (we have twin boys age 9) but other than that - no$ no other support and still nothing...BAM I was single mom!! Which at the time was trumatic of course but now I have adjusted quite well and love it.
Anyway to my little awakening..
Yesterday I get a call from my ex mother in law who I still talk to quite frequently- we always got along and are still very close. Well she called to announce to me in a happy voice how excited she is that my ex husband and his girlfriend are going to have a baby girl. Ok first I should point out he told me he didnt want any other children while he was with me which at the time I was devistated so finding out hes having a child is pretty surprising...and not to add he isnt supporting the ones he already has! Anyway when I heard it I GOT PISSED but I didnt yell - I got quiet. She says "oh should I not have told you? Are you not okay with this?" I politely said well it does bother me of course how could it not? Well she felt so bad she started to cry and then apologized and hung up.
After this call...I sat there pretty stung. Like a bomb was just dropped on me. 2 years ago I would have been in depression for MONTHS with that news. BUT yesterday I realized just how far I HAVE come...about an hour later I simply just recovered and didnt care.
I NEVER thought I would feel this way. I thought I would be stuck in hate and anger for him forever.
I have finally realize how much energy and time I have wasted - and feel FREE!!
Anyway upward and onward to all of you!!
ITS a HELL of a battle but things will get better. Trust me I went thru the worst!!
HUGSS!!
mbfun

It is nice to see how far you have come. It gives hope to those of us who are not quite as far!
Good for you!
Hey you!! Thanks!! I am doing really well very happy-- how are YOU doing?
MB
Thanks- that was my goal to show everyone who is in the UGLY /NASTY parts or where you are meeting with custody evaluators - or attorneys to fight over $ and property and perhaps issues like mine where they left you for someone else. ALL of it IS survivable and you CAN find happiness again.
You are truly healing. Very happy to hear you are doing so well. I come and go from this site. I am yet to be D. I had a court date last year and it was almost done but H did not show up in court. It was his case against me. He wanted out for his new life I guess. Never trying to reconcile after a lifetime of marriage. He still has not learned that you have to cooperate sometimes. His lawyer let him go.
I am suppose to be having new papers drawn up. I know I have to do it but I do not find the strength. At this point the papers would just provide some financial security.I know I have to do it but here I sit. I am sad and mad lately. I can not pick up the phone to call the lawyer( not sure he will work w/me, no money)
I admire you for your reaction to the baby news. I hope to find myself there in the near future. I think putting it all behind me will be a good thing. The OW told me when we first met that she had done a lot for my family. She ended her pregnancy by my H.
I need to be more responsible despite the pain and sadness I feel.
Best of luck to you always. You should be proud.
That's great, good for you!
Karen ~ wildlucky4me
Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~