im soo depressed!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2004
im soo depressed!!!!
1
Fri, 09-29-2006 - 7:53pm

Well i have been on this board a few times, and recieved alot of advise..but i left when things would change and get bad.. and oh they got worse! dont know if i will be remembered.. i hope not lol it was an awful story.
im 24..were both 24 married young and always had problems due to his lack of respect for me.. his mothre's lack of respect for me, found out he was unfaithful with his "friend" and yada yada yada... well in the bigg. of the year things with us got bad... so much that callign me names, and teklling me i was worthless was an everyday thing. told me he didnt love me and that he didnt even know why we married! @@
we have a 1 year old and one on the way due early in the next year. well, i got so upset one day when he told me that he hated me and i found other numbers in his phone... i slapped him a good on on his face! and he did it to me.. it was rediculous i know!!!
well, a few months ago... we got into a heated argument and his mom called.. heard us yelling and she decided to call the police and say i was beating him!!! needless to say i had cops at my house in a few minutes and he never denied that i beat him.. i didnt beat him, i slepped him a while back! and they arrested me! i was in jail for 4 days... i went to court, got a lawyer and the charges were dropped for lack of evidence.THANK GOD!
well when i was in jail... he decided to go back to court and get a restrainign order on me and put my baby's name ... so for 6 weeks i was un able to know about or see my little girl! it was the most awful thing i have ever been through! i went to get a family lawyer and put in paperwork for a divorce.. we went to court and we fought for custody. i won ofcourse ;)
well its been like 2 months since then... and i have been trying really hard to get past it for my kids... i didnt want to be mad at him and be miserable for ever so i wanted to be the bigger person. well a a few weeks ago, he started callign me everyday and wanting to talk for hours! about nothing! we even went out one night with the baby ofcourse. not a date. well just a few days ago i found out that he had slept with his best friends wife while we were maried!!! i confronted him and he denied it.. i showed him proof and he said no.LOL what a liar! so anyways... i was upset but what can i do right? were seperated so i have to swallow it and move on. i also found out that he is "talking" to a girl online @@ and it bothers me.. i dont know why! i knew he had dated others girls right after i moved out and that didnt bother me but this particvular girl does! i think it's becuase this girl is the same age as me... she has a one year old liek me and is pregnant and due 4 days after me!!!! im upset because it boggles my mind that he wants to talk to this girl when her family is started already (oh she is also seperated and is "workign things out with her husband soon" whatever that means??? why does he want that family but not his??? im puzzled! and how can he do this soo soon? they stared talking 3 weeks ago (they met in a dating site LOL) they havent met yet but they are already talking like they are together.. she calls him sweetie, babe, love, and he calls her sexy and says that one day they will be close! what the hell????? im so ughhh HURT! everyday i let it consume my life and it makes me sad, miserable and missing him! i miss him! i miss our family! i miss our home... especially when he calls me everyday and we have good conversation. why does he call me everyday???? i let him sure, but i want to know why bother if he didnt want to be with me??? im so confused!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Sat, 09-30-2006 - 8:23am
Hi there! I was wondering how you were doing. No matter what, when you find out about a spouse's infidelity, it's always a massive shock. Especially when you're pregnant! My ex had an EX while I was pregnant, and let me tell you, I've never felt such pain and dispair. The best thing you can do for yourself right now is cut off all contact (starting today!) that is not pertaining to your children. I know it's hard, but the more you talk to him, the more difficult it will be for you to move on. Make a commitment to yourself today to stop hurting yourself by talking to him.