It was inevitable & I probably messed up

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
It was inevitable & I probably messed up
5
Sun, 01-08-2006 - 9:07pm

shouldnt have emailed him back, but i couldnt help myself!


For the 1st time, I ran into STBX out last nite (we live in a small seaside town & we both frequent the same places when out, but he is out WAY more than I am & i have been very careful in the past to look for his car b4 going in for a drink or dinner). & it happened last nite.


I dont know what condition he was when i saw him but i am pretty sure it wouldnt have been good after the game (Yey Patriots!) b/c it was like 11:30pm. I was at Zeldas Cafe after

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Sun, 01-08-2006 - 9:18pm

I think it's fine.

Photobucket

Avatar for momtojoeybear
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 01-08-2006 - 10:35pm

R~

Like Jennie, I don't know if I would have sent the email, but I love what your therapist said with the 80/20 thing...

Its funny, because since my xh lives out of state, the event you described really cannot happen... but recently, I was out to dinner with a guy friend of mine (a former friend of his actually) and he called my cell... I answered and he asked if Joey was asleep, to which I responded that I truly didn't know, because I had gone out to dinner with a friend... there were a few minutes of silence, followed by an oh... but it was one of those oh's like it was the last thing he expected to hear...

I hung up and told my friend what he had said... he summed it up perfectly... oh, so you (xh) can go out and have an affair, but your ex-wife can't go out to dinner 1 1/2 years after you've been divorced... give me a break...

UGH... xh's... don't want to live with them, can't shoot them!

Sending lots of hugs to you with your Mom... I'm glad that she was able to give you the gift that she did, showing you that life is too short, and I know she's proud of you today!

*hugs*

Julie

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 01-09-2006 - 12:41am

I think that what you said was fine.... and it is totally fine for you to go out with a friend (male or female)... and he'll just have to get over it.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2006
Fri, 01-13-2006 - 9:01am
My stbx tried the same crap with saying 'he had pictures of me at a MAN'S house' - well, I was at a man's house, a person I have been friends with for over nine years. Our kids grew up together and if my stbx had been around more often back then, he would know we are only friends. About a month and a half ago my stbx called me and was screaming at me that I was 'adulturous' and a 'whore' and our son knows it (which is not true) and that's when he informed me of these 'pictures' he has of my car in this particular driveway. Oh and by the way, my stbx had a 'witness' (who? his new girlfriend????) I was very calm through the whole 'conversation' (sorry - but I think screaming obscenities at someone hardly constitutes a normal conversation) and told him that if he did in fact have supposed 'pictures' all that proves is that he is still stalking me. He did not like that at all. So my point is let your stbx blast away at threats and humiliating comments (that one he made about your mom was DEFINATELY below the belt) because in the end he is the one who's loss it really is and will continue to look like a complete ass. Unbelievable. Pam
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 01-13-2006 - 9:26am
I like that twist...... HE was stalking YOU by having the photos...... SWEET!

Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~