It's a good day today

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2006
It's a good day today
1
Wed, 01-24-2007 - 9:30am

I hope this can continue.

I kept a vow of silence for the last month because I was fed up with H's emails and refusal to listen to me. His incessant begging and threats were very draining and it only got worse... recently threatening his own life.

I broke the silence Monday after yet another episode of him blowing up on my dad. I got on him about how his current behavior is exactly why I want a divorce and it's certainly not helping. His reply was still full of hurt and confusion, but it had a slight hint of resignation.

I jumped on the opportunity to encourage civility and promised to keep talking to him as long as it's rational and he doesn't ask me to change my mind anymore. If he goes back to the begging and threatening, I would cut off contact again.

So far so good. He sent me a message late last night that was very civil. Talked about our finances. He did state that he still wished I wouldn't file just yet and try dating after we've cooled off but it's my choice and he won't bring it up again. He understands that it's probably too late. He also talked about how his brother is helping him maintain his sanity through this.

I hope this can continue. As bad as its been and the cycles we've been through, part of me isn't holding my breath and fully expects more outbursts. But ... one can only hope... that he can remain civil and we can get through this unscathed.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 01-26-2007 - 11:07am

I told my EX that if he wanted to try dating (just before we divorced as an alternative) that enough was enough... and that dating meant we had to go all the way back to not actually being married.


Needless to say, he pleaded to date right through the divorce... and for months afterward...


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~