Its a good thing

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2006
Its a good thing
3
Mon, 03-19-2007 - 9:40am
My stbx has refused to get an attorney and go to court in april. I was so concerned that he was going to make this difficult for me. He is not a bad guy, when he drinks, he's a psycho. I contacted my attorney who told me that if STBX doesn't show up in court, then he will use any date of separation that he wants. (in my state a couple needs to be separated for a year, if children are involved.) The date we are going to use is February 2006. (as this was the last time stbx and i were intimate, for lack of a better word.) The judge will then set a final hearing, complete with a witness, and my divorce will be final. That should be somewhere around mid-late may. Ironically, my 21st wedding anniversary would be May 24. Weird huh?
what
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-01-2007
Mon, 03-19-2007 - 11:20pm
For the last 3 1/2 years, I have celebrated two anniversaries. I call them my personal Independence Days: Dec. 21, the day I married the jerk; and Aug. 23, the day I divorced the jerk. On those two days, I get myself a nice drink and send him a toast and thank him for leaving me. I have been happier without him these last 4 years than I was ever with him. Thank God for letting me see the light.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2006
Tue, 03-20-2007 - 8:29am

Wow! I guess that is good news. I hope it goes smoothly. I know there is still lots of yuck to deal with (the house, etc) and your kids and you don't get over this overnight, but each thing is a step towards taking care of yourself and your children, right?!

I will be thinking of you!

M

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2006
Tue, 03-20-2007 - 11:55am

M-
I'm full of many mixed emotions. In a way, i feel it is way to fast as i only moved out in january. On the other hand, I have been living with this man, but separately for over 4 years now. So what is the difference? All of these emotions are so difficult to sort through. I guess its a rollercoaster ride and some days will undoubtedly be worse than others. On a positive note, other days will be fantastic.

My kids have ups and downs. I am trying so hard to keep things "normal" for them. But the truth is that DD misses her father so much. Which confuses DS because, according to him, "dad never spent anytime with us anyway, so what is her problem?"

I am trying to move on as best i can.

C

what