Just got served by STBX- can he do that?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
Just got served by STBX- can he do that?
4
Sun, 03-05-2006 - 10:39pm

It was ugly. Thought he was coming over to write me a check for $$ to help pay my rent. He had a manilla envelope, I asked him what it was, he told me divorce papers. Meanwhile, I am studying for midterms.

He FREAKED out that I wouldn't sign them then and there. We don't own a home together or have children, so he says I just need to sign them to get on with it. Meanwhile, his family has made it clear to him that he can't bring his new GF (the OW) over until we are divorced soooooo, obviously this is the reason he wants the ball rolling.

I told him no, that I needed at LEAST to talk to a lawyer and find out what my rights are before I will sign them. I would be a fool to sign papers he shoves in front of my nose. Right???

Woah, I am dizzy with shock, haven't even cried yet.

Avatar for momtojoeybear
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 03-05-2006 - 10:47pm

Hey there...

I'm sorry that you're in a state of shock right now... I think your reaction is completely normal... even if you're expecting to get the papers, actually seeing them can affect you in a way you may not have expected...

You absolutely did the right thing by not signing them immediately... it sounds like he was trying to bully you into doing what he wants... and its not all about him anymore... and these things can take time... so find an attorney, if you don't have one all ready, so that you can have them go over them for you and with you, so you have an understanding of what you're signing... after all, even without the home or children, you as the wife still has rights and you need to make sure that your rights are protected in the agreement...

Keep us posted...

*hugs*

Julie

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Mon, 03-06-2006 - 1:56pm
Not without a lawyer looking over them. Stand up for yourself. Take care of yourself.
Hugs, Brenda

Hugs, Brenda 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2006
Mon, 03-06-2006 - 3:45pm
Yes he can do that and no you don't have to sign them. Bring them to your lawyer and get advised of all your rights under your state's laws.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Tue, 03-07-2006 - 10:54am
Well, technically.... you weren't "served".... that can't happen by the "other party".

Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~