Just need to vent

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-04-2006
Just need to vent
1
Thu, 12-07-2006 - 9:46pm
I am posting here to try to stop myself from trying to contact my ex again. I cant' stop obsessing over him - I wish I could let go. Then I find myself writing emails to him (I would be calling him if he were not out of the country). I feel like I need some closure from him, which I know there is no such thing and as I read the other posts here I know we need to find our own closure. I feel kind of crazy, like why can't I stop myself from thinking about him constantly? Everyone I know is telling me to move on, I know I need to move on, and I know that it takes time, but each day seems like an eternity of trying to hold myself together. And I feel so angry that he's moved on so easily as if he was just changing his socks instead of his spouse, but at the same time, when I speak to him or send him messages I still don't have the courage to really tell him how angry I am. I know that he just held on the last few years until he was sure that he could find someone else, but I can't stop loving him even now. We never imagine we'll end up in this position and it's unthinkable, unbearable, worse than I could have imagined.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2006
In reply to: npemmb
Thu, 12-07-2006 - 11:25pm

Good job! Post here anytime you want to talk to him! At least you know that you should be doing something other than contacting him, which is a great start! NO contact is the best thing when you are trying to move on. I know how hard it is, even once they have moved on. I know you love him but remember, you only want to be with someone who wants you back.

You aren't crazy! Everyday is going to be a battle, but I promise it will get easier! I never imagined myself to be married and divorced at my age, but ya know, life has a funny way of changing the plans you made for yourself. But as frustrating as it sounds, everything happens for a reason even if you don't know what that reason is yet.

Keep your head up, and I'm always here if you need to vent!

~Jenn