Just need to vent
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Just need to vent
| Thu, 08-04-2005 - 3:27pm |
First off i got married really young i was 16 almost 17 and now i'm 19. Hubby and i have had our problems like everyone but this last year has been so hard for us. But last week he left to go be with his family and i was suppose to go down in a couple weeks but the other day he calls me up and tells me he wants a divorce when i thought everything was getting better it was a shock i started crying like crazy and for some reason everyone in my family expected me to be okay with it but i feel like my world is ending right now and i dont know if i can do this. I guess the one good thing about this is that we are still going to be friends we dont want things to get messy. I just feel like i'm dieing on the inside and i wish this pain would go away. I feel like this pain will never end. I just needed to let some of it out cause i cant do it with anyone in my family. thanks for listening

I know the feeling. It totally sucks. Just remember it WILL get better for you eventually. Maybe in a month, maybe a year, maybe 2 years.... but at some point, you'll look back on this time and say "Wow that SUCKED, but I'm better now." Just knowing that day will come calms me down a little somtimes.
Are you seeing a therapist? I am and it really helps. Good luck. Email me anytime. gewdtimes@yahoo.com
Hugs, Brenda
Hugs, Brenda
"I guess the one good thing about this is that we are still going to be friends we dont want things to get messy."
So sorry you have been tossed into the long, dark tunnel. Know that there is a bright new day at the other end. Don't worry yet (not for a LONG time) about being friends. First you have to learn to let go, then work through your anger at this betrayal, then find your happy new life. It could be many years before any attempts to be "friendly" will do anything but hurt you. I like to say you can act friendly-like. You can be polite, civil. But don't get all confused and tangled up in trying to act like a friend. You have to take care of YOU now, and forget him.
mandy, I am really sorry you are going through this. I am at the beggining of my divorce, too (this is the 2nd time I have filed, but I am going through with it this time!), and I feel absolutely horrible. My STBX were separated 2.5 years ago. During that time, I found a wonderful message board where other women were going through the same things. Many of those women from 2.5 years ago have gone on to have wonderful relationships, and several have gotten married. I know it seems bleak right now, but things will get better. It takes time, and the process is painful.
Also, don't let anyone say, "Oh, you're 19...you're young, you'll get over it...." It still terribly painful, no matter what your age. Your feelings are just as valid as anyone else's. Hang in there.