just not sure...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-14-2005
just not sure...
2
Fri, 09-14-2007 - 9:26am

Geeeez, you would think the longer you are separated, the clearer things would get or be concerning reconciling or truly divorcing & going on w/your life. Of course when "going on w/your life" consists of three children, it's a little more difficult than your average.


We've/I've been to counseling, read as many books as I could get my hands on (and I suggest everyone do this as well, very helpful!) but I still haven't came to a definite conclusion on anything. And not saying that the time hasn't made things clearer - it has.


Basically I've figured out that my husband has an emotional

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 09-14-2007 - 4:47pm

It IS challenging... and for me, that "limbo" period... where I was unsure... things were undecided.... was the worst!


And it wasn't until after the divorce had happened and I was living on my own and the world didn't crash before me that I finally started to feel better about my life.


Thinking about divorce.... should we, shouldn't we.... separation.... will we, won't we.... is too much limbo to be able to really feel anything but conflicted.


Listen to your head!


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-14-2005
Sat, 09-15-2007 - 1:00pm

Yeh, it is the worst - confliction isn't constant TG. I just have some days when I'm more so than others. Ultimately I think even if I know it's highly unlikely that we will reconcile, as long as we are married, it's still on the table & a possibility.


This is different for me from "break-ups" in the past. Being that I have three kids now, it's totally different & I really have no real desire to get back into another "relationship" - and in the past, that has always been the final closing of the door - when I've started seeing someone else etc. So...


Knowing what directions you don't want to go in, doesn't