Just Sick Over Separation
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| Thu, 11-16-2006 - 5:42am |
After 5 years of marriage I'm finally getting the ball rolling on separation. I've been trying to find a lawyer to assist with the separation.
My husband says it's a long time and coming but he does nothing! He makes is hard to leave and impossible to stay because he makes no effort either way. I know he's depressed but time to step up to the plate already! He keeps on me to get things done and it is making me angry because he's the one with the support system and money. I feel his family has withdrawn from me and it's hurtful as I have no family. We are still living together but all he does is go to work, sit on the computer six hours a night and sleep - he refuses to communicate with me other than email. How can you separate over email!?
I'm just sick over all this. I carry so much pain from this experience, I've been getting major anxiety and have troubles sleeping as my mind races. Is this the worst part right now? I'm scared to be alone and start over. Thankfully we don't have children (but I would like to start a family - just not with him with the way he is right now) but do have three dogs, two which I will be taking. I just don't know yet what to do next. I hope it gets better. I was told divorce (if it eventally leads to that - which I'm sure it will) is worse than suffering a death. Any tips of surviving?

Lab,
Sounds like your husband is playing the passive-aggressive part in this situation. There are things you'll need to do to prepare for life on your own. Start with getting a job. It will give you a greater sense of independence and provide you with potential friendships. Second, find a support group either through a church or synagouge or your local mental health center. Sharing your life events with others going through the same process can be helpful.
Good luck,
CL-Wisdomtooth2020
labougoush...
PG doesn't think there's "a graceful way" for any couple to co-habitate while the divorce papers are being drawn up?
Simply because 'memories from the past' have a tendency to bring out every emotion we have? I'm talking everything from ANGER and BITTERNESS to SADNESS and REGRET!
My only suggestion for you is to LOOK AHEAD to what your desires are? If they're realistic, focus on them INSTEAD of how your 'ALMOST EX-HUSBAND' is behaving right now.
This comes from a man who (sadly) has been divorced twice, and had a 4-year relationship that he incorrectly assumed would last forever? But despite these 3 setbacks, I haven't completely given up on the "dream" of enjoying a happy, successful relationship with a special lady SOMETIME in the future?
Pianoguy