Letting the kids see his girlfriend.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2007
Letting the kids see his girlfriend.
12
Thu, 02-22-2007 - 5:08pm

Someone help me.. I can't do anything without bursting into tears.

I'm trying so hard not to be the typical soon to be ex wife. My stbx left me for his current girlfriend. He decided for his own sake he'd like to drag this whole thing out and just remain married until he had enough money... basicly he wants to live his bachelor life.. movies, concerts, bars, video games, dates with his girlfriend.. ect ect.

We have two kids together(both are under the age of five). He moved out he's refused to help me pay for ANYTHING and he still wants me to let him see them.. (I make less money than him!.. I mean like ALOT less.) Recently he's started pushing me to let him have the kids around his girlfriend. He's complaining that his girlfriend is getting upset about me not "accepting her" and letting her see the kids.WHAT THE HELL. I said 'NO/GET A LAWYER' basicly.

Well he hasn't and I met with my possible divorce lawyer.. I know sooner or later I'm gonna have to let go and let him have the kids around her. God I feel like I'm breaking.. she took my husband and now she wants my kids.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2007
Tue, 03-06-2007 - 1:41am
I can relate a lil on this one. My stbx has only been seperated for 2 months and is seeing another girl which 'aparantly' my 4 yr old saw 'kiss daddy'. My take on this whole thing....Have you actually filed for divorce yet?? I paid for mine not even two months ago and my atturney had asked me if I wanted to seek temporary child support while seperated. I said no b/c we had split the bills/assets ect, but now I'm wishing I had as things are turning bad. There is ABSOLUTELY NO fairness in you trying to make it on your income w/ the kids and him living the bachelor life and not giving you a cent. Divorce atturney or not, he needs to pay up! Secondly, is he living w/ the g/f?....if so I've been told (when kids are involved) that looks REALLY bad on him. and Thirdly I know you dont want the kids to be hurt in anyway, you're got to find a way to make him understand or realize that he's the father...you didnt pop out those kids by being asexual. He was there to make the babies, he needs to be there to support them.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-03-2003
Tue, 03-06-2007 - 9:56am
I feel your pain. My stbxh had an affair with a coworker and is now living with the adultress whore. I actually am in contact with her stbxh, I have to go testify at their divorce hearing in two weeks. Everyone involved has been called to testify...should be an interesting day. My jerk stbxh took my kids to a children's museum with the whore and her spawn...he was supposed to take our boys to the PINEWOOD DERBY that my son MADE A CAR FOR! Can you freaking believe that crap?!?!?!? Took them all ice skating last weekend. My kids seem to like the whore and her spawn, which I guess is good...makes my skin crawl but, I just plaster a smile on my face and say...gee, that is just wonderful. I'm so glad you had fun. Another good point is that I live an hour away from them but, and right around the corner from his mom so, when he has visitation he stays with them at his moms house and not with the whore...for now.
What also sucks is I met a REALLY nice man and I am a bit of a wrek and will probably F up the relationship (rebound). Told him exactly where I am at and that we need to be no more than friends until I get a separation agreement in hand. Also, my boys won't be able to meet him for a long, long time since they are already stressed by meeting the adultress whore prematurely. Not that I would want them to, just pointing it out.


Edited 3/6/2007 12:20 pm ET by amyality

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