Lurkers come and say hi :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Lurkers come and say hi :)
16
Wed, 06-22-2005 - 8:51am

Hey guys!


I was thinking maybe we would get some of the lurkers to come out and say a quick hi. If you want to share your story, please feel free.


We have had a lot of new members lately and it made me realize that we have quite a few lurkers :)


We are all here for support and hugs. Join us :)


Hugs to you,


Angelena

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Wed, 06-22-2005 - 4:12pm

Hi and welcome :)


Hugs to you for what you are going through but congrats on recongnizing you needed to leave the situation :)


I look forward to posting with ya!


Hugs,


Angelena

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2005
Wed, 06-22-2005 - 8:19pm
Hi there!
I have posted a few times, but I lurk almost every day. My 28 yr marriage ended when my STBX left me a note on the counter last January. I was in a lot of pain that first time I posted, but I am doing much better now. I don't think I even want him back anymore! I am doing fine so far financially, as long as he gives me money to help pay the credit cards and loans each month. (We agreed to split this 50-50.) There are no dependent children, so I don't have any of those problems. When I read the posts about the problems most of you are going through, I feel so sorry for all the pain you have to put up with and problems you have to solve! I guess my biggest problem right now is feeling lonely and unwanted, and coming to this board (also a couple others) helps with that. I really appreciate all the support I got here during the time I was hurting so much, and I hope I can help out with advice or a cheerful word once and awhile. And thank you for encouraging the lurkers to post! Sometimes we're just shy . . .
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Wed, 06-22-2005 - 8:41pm
Hello All, I poked my head in a few days back so most of you know my story. My husband served me with divorce papers about 3 1/2 months ago. He took everything and I had nothing but my clothes. As we are nearing the end ( I can't believe this is happening or that come August it will all be over), I am slowly getting some of my life back. I am so tired of being sad. I wish there was a magic pill to make it all go away. I am glad that I am beyond the point where that magic pill would have been a bullet between my eyes. I am looking to the horizon where I hope there is happiness. Hugs, Brenda

Hugs, Brenda 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2004
Wed, 06-22-2005 - 8:42pm

Hi,

I just started lurking this week, but what the hey :-). I left my husband (married four years, together for seven) last summer under somewhat scary circumstances, but after several rough months, things improved and my life is coming together well. Our son is three and a half and we share custody, and honestly we're way better at that than we were at being married. He (DS) is doing really well, and I know this is a much better situation for him to grow up in than if I had stayed.

I've had a real emotional rollercoaster but right now there are more ups than downs and I'm going to go with that and hope it continues. Money is tight, but getting better, I can keep the house on my own (modest house, but I like it), I'm making new friends to make up for the loss of the ones who are more 'his' than 'mine'.

He started dating his boss' secretary immediately after I left, and trotting around with his new family. That was hard, on my ego as much as anything else, but I'm at the point(mostly) where I can think it's good if he's happy because a happy father is better for DS. Also b/c it gave him someone to focus on other than me.

It's been good for me to read the shared custody thread, particularly, since I know only one other person IRL besides me who has this set up, and people thought I was nuts when I set it up. Now that they see it working however, they understand better.

CC

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2004
Wed, 06-22-2005 - 9:04pm

Well, my name is Kelly. I have 2 kids (6 & 4). This board has helped me so much because I thought I was the only one feeling the way I do. My story... I though my husband was having an affair, so I asked him about it and he left me. Little did I know he moved in with another woman, I did not find out about this until she called me one night in the middle of the night wanting to know why I was calling him so much, seems he told her we have been divorced for 6 months (he just left in April and we havent even started the divorce process). He says he isnt seeing her anymore and he goes back and forth between wanting to work it out and wanting a divorce. I dont know what I want, part of me misses him like crazy and I am afraid I will be alone the rest of my life, also my kids miss him so much. But the other part of me is glad he is gone. He has been a real jerk through most of this time, hasnt paid me a single cent to help take care of the kids, has been purposefully cruel. I am very confused and have found a lot of support here even though I have never posted. Thanks for listening :)

Kelly

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-03-2005
Wed, 06-22-2005 - 9:29pm
I have been lurking for three months now. This board has helped me so much. My dh and I were married for 7 years together 11, we have a three year old son. I thought we had the perfect marriage, we rarely fought, went out, had fun, until Nov, when I found an email to a female friend of his. He said they had feelings for eachother (she was married with two toddlers). He ended it, and was trying to work on our marriage until March, when he left, said he was unhappy and coulde not "fall" back in love with me. I found out that him and the OW had been meeting at lunch talking and on th ephone since Jan, he even lied thru councilling. He said it was never physical, I don tknow. She is still with her dh but leaving him, I dont know if they plan to be together. Right now I still get the "i am so sad. I can;t eat or sleep" etc emails, and how sorry he is. Whatever, I am done now. I miss him like crazy, but know I have to move on, its very very hard for me. He was my future, and my one and only love. WE met at 18 married at 23. We live in Ontario, Canada, and I finally got my agreement signed, he is being very generous but I think its the guilt.

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