Meeting at DD's school ex showed up
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Meeting at DD's school ex showed up
| Tue, 11-15-2005 - 11:33am |
I went to my dd's school for a meeting regarding her reading problems. I've been doing these meetings for over a year and now he's showing up. I'm just waiting for hi to start manipulating when the meetings are going to take place. I generally schedule them for my days off. I've been doing this for a long time including when my son was in elementary school and had issues. Now all of a sudden he's going to these meetings.

Accept he used it as an opportunity to air our issues regarding divorce. He tried to blame everything on that when in truth she's had reading problems since first grade. He takes every opportunity to boo-hoo about children of divorce. Guess he should have thought of that when he filed.
I've always scheduled these visits on days off and now you can bet that my days off won't be convient for him to be at the meetings. He uses every chance he can get to bash my job or work schedule to anyone that will listen.
That would be REALLY hard. To sit in such a meeting and not rise to his baiting!! Does he do this when you two are alone, or complain to the school employees? Wishing you the strength of a Saint.
If he is causing a disruption in the meeting, I think I would say to the school, "I think you can see for yourself that having both myself and the father in the same meeting is distracting us from the true subject - how to help the child. I hope you can understand why I am going to ask you this, would it be possible for you to meet with just me on the days I have scheduled? If my Ex would also like a meeting, can you meet with him separately? I understand it is an imposition on your time..."
Edited 11/15/2005 3:39 pm ET by rosemile
While going through our divorce proceedings, my ex tried to do that. I just told the teacher that I could not have parent-teacher meetings with my ex because he was abusive - told them about the order of protection, his ocd, stalking me, etc. Although the teachers were not happy with having to do duplicate meetings, I insisted.
I learned from the book, "Why Does He Do That" by Lundy Bancroft, that counselling with abusive men (and these kinds of situations) is only a ploy by the men to further abuse the woman. I feel for you.
My ex is still TRYING to abuse me through various ways (phone messages, insulting me to by new husband, telling others that I am crazy, etc.) Slowly, I think about him/it less, but when I am under a lot of pressure (like now), it really irritates me.
Good advice, I think probably in this situation Rosemiles advice is the best.
GL
Heidi