Missing being married

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2007
Missing being married
7
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 3:57pm
I really miss my ex-husband, and his son. I really loved the both of them. I have a son of my own, and should put all my engery into him. The marriage is over, but I still want to call and talk to him. He has a girlfriend, and that's all I can think about, him with her. It hurts so bad. I loved being married, I guess I wasn't very good at it. Sorry about jumping back in forth, my feelings are just so jumbled these days. I just want to let go, but I don't know how. I have not called him, so I guess that is a start. Why can men go go out and get some, and be okay. While I'm sitting here missing him like crazy. I try to stay busy, but it dosen't matter, all the thoughts creep back into my head. I feel totally alone, and lost. Nobody wants to hear me go on about my marriage/divorce, anymore. So this the only only place I can. Is there anyone out there who has felt this way, tell me how they got over the love of their life.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2004
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 4:39pm
I know exactly how your feel, I'm in the same boat, I miss my husband terribly, we have tried over and over to make things work, or should I say I tried... we where together for 2 weeks and he just left again Monday, I feel lost... like you said they can just pick up and go on like nothing happend... I know they are a different breed.... but geeeze do they have any feelings..... So I guess that didn't help you much, but your not alone in this, and i can only hope and pray that everyone is right and it does get better. I even went to work today and didn't cry, that was a step in the right direction.. Good luck to you and I hope you find the peace and comfort you deserve... hugs Kathy
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-16-2004
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 4:52pm

You sound like my exhusband, he loved being married but he didn't love me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2005
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 6:36pm
I miss the things that go along with marrige. This morning I was missing being held when I first wake up. Yesterday it was having someone to call and tell when it started to snow. We don't get snow but every few years. I found myself picking up the phone to tell stbx about it. Then I changed my mind. Even though we are still living together I miss the little things married people do.

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 02-01-2007 - 7:40pm
Pink, It's been two years and I have still not gotten over it, but I am moving forward. I still love him, want him, and need him. Yes he is the love of my life. I don't have any answers for you, but I do have huge hugs.
Hugs, Brenda

Hugs, Brenda 

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-21-2006
Fri, 02-02-2007 - 10:10am

I understand. There is nothing wrong with you loving your husband. But try to find something to fill the void you have right now whether its a boyfriend to date or a new exciting hobby. We have to control our minds somehow and NOT think of them with her~

I have decided to stay in contact with mine. for a while. Some on here will say that is wrong and some wont. I dont have the time or desire right now to Find a man. I want to concentrate on my career and my hobbies. If he marrys the woman some day so be it .......but he is leaving to go work out of town and will be coming here on weekends ....she is furthur away LOL But I think my husband has a serious issue with mid life crisis right now.

anyway I do understand you still loving him. If you really feel it is completely over than perhaps a new guy in your life will help. We get attached to our loved ones and when they leave or die we are devastated. But remember: THERE ARE STILL ICE CREAM CONES TO EAT!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2006
Sat, 02-03-2007 - 11:54am
I would like to be able to tell you that it will be easy but I know that it wont be I to was in the same boat as you and let it control my life for over eight months. I was married for eleven years and had three children with this young lady to whom I devoted all of my heart and love to. I found that in time I was able to move on and heal the wounds of my heart. I tryed to keep us together for as long as I could but it just didnt work. Some things are better left to change. But the best thing I can tell you right now is to be strong for your self and your son god is giving you a second chance at your life so take it and run with it do your best and remember if it was ment to be he will come back. Take care and I wish you the best.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2005
Sat, 02-03-2007 - 1:13pm
I too am struggling with exactly what you are struggling with. I have been on my own with my two sons for almost 2 years. My H had an affair with a someone who was 27 he was 44, we had been married for 22 years.
We are friendly to each other and i sometimes think that makes it harder. He had another girlfriend who he recently broke up with(not the ow, that one ended last xmas). He hasn't ever been on his own, it seems like he can't be.
I miss sharing thing with someone. I miss being close to someone and enjoying the intimacy with someone.
I am trying my best to get on with my life, just started a gym and focusing on myself and hoping that soon, not sure when, but i will be ready to take a chance again with someone.
I think that is all we can do right now is focus on us.
Hugs to you.