My Weddng Annivesary is tommorrow. HELP
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| Mon, 09-10-2007 - 11:01am |
Hello Ladies ,I coulld really uses some support/advice.
I have been seperated since August 1st. (2 kids 8 & 6).
A quick history: Husband is an overachiever/workaholic who made a very successful business while ignoring us at home. "It's all for us"..."Fine, you want me to throw in the towel...I'll go get a $10/ hour job!"...Lots of scare tactics were thrown at me when I'd ask for more co-parenting or attention from him. Anyhow,I just withdrew: filled ,my life with friends, kids, food :)... He found a woman he choose to have an affair with (on & off for 1 year). I found out, we went to therapy for a year, I thought we were both honestly working toward healing & rebuilding, but no, he was lying all along & never ended it. So here we are. seperated. He says it's over, he does'nt want her, doesn't want a divorce...bl;ah balh blah...I really in truly don't know what I want. I am miserable when he has the children at his place. In 8 years, he has never been with them for any real length of time. I have happily had that role. Now, it's so hard to "give them over to him". Our relationship is not bad now, no yelling..basically lots of sadness & crying on my part. I feel like I'm in a fog.
Our Annivesary it tommorrow, and I'm wondering is we shold go have coffee/lunch or what. Do I get a card, a gift? Am I screwed up or what? WHAT WOULD YOU DO? I feel so alone and confused. It really sucks!

Paddy,
I'd let him make the first move to acknowledge the anniversary date, if he does. Meanwhile, make other plans for your time, i.e. go out to lunch with a friend, see a movie, take your kids to the library, etc. Something to do
CL-Wisdomtooth2020