The name

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2007
The name
7
Tue, 03-20-2007 - 10:37pm

Did you all go back to your maiden name after the d?

Here's the thing. I really like my name from my marraige. And I don't want to change it back. But is it a must? Or am I just trying to hold onto one last thing? I never like my maiden name (lot of bad childhood stuff) and really think that is what it is. I was so glad the day I didn't have to use it again and now I don't wanna go back to it.

Any thoughts?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2001
In reply to: bustedbutterfly
Tue, 03-20-2007 - 10:56pm
Do what's comfortable for you. I kept my married name because of the kids AND because I'm known by it professionally. I contemplate reverting to my maiden name once in a while, but it's too much of a hassle! And frankly, having the same name as the XH cranks his NW off, which tickles me.

~calla~  mom to rosie and gracie

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2007
In reply to: bustedbutterfly
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 12:14am
I say do what is right for you. I will take my maiden name back, I like it better and it gives me the feeling of going back to who I really am without being a wife. I go back to me and just me (with kids that is). If you do not like your maiden then keep the one you have now or choose a new one. Good luck
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2005
In reply to: bustedbutterfly
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 8:23am

I took my maiden name back and the court order was signed on the same day as our divorce was finalized. It was a PITA to change everything but I felt, at the time, that it was the best thing for me. I wanted to feel like I was getting myself back and a little bit to hurt my XH (bad reason, I know). Now, nearly 2 years later, I do regret changing it mostly because my maiden name is clunky and his was much easier to say on the phone!! LOL... but seriously, you have to do what's best for YOU. IMHO, I see no problem in keeping your exes name but it's a personal choice.

Hugs
Ali

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
In reply to: bustedbutterfly
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 4:13pm

I have mixed feelings about "the name".

I kept my married name because of our son. I just have a hard time thinking I spent 29 years as Moore and only 5 years as Redd and here I am keeping Redd, probably for the rest of my life. I honestly have bad feelings about both.

Keep your married name if you please. It's up to you. Is he asking for his name back? Some guys do that.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-03-2003
In reply to: bustedbutterfly
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 7:23pm
I'm keeping my married name, it is so much cooler than my maiden name. I get compliments on it frequently, as a matter of fact. I actually didn't change my official name with social security until after I knew I was getting divorced. I always just filed taxes under my maiden name to avoid audit but, for the job I have now they insisted that my SS card match my drivers license so, I JUST went and changed it to my married name about 2 months ago. Weird, hugh? Like all the other folks said...do whatever you want...its your life!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2007
In reply to: bustedbutterfly
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 11:37pm
Do you have kids? That is why I am keeping my married name. I think it will be an easier transition for them at school, etc. Plus most of their friends will still call me that anyway so I might as well keep it. (hopefully I wont have it forever). :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-02-2006
In reply to: bustedbutterfly
Mon, 03-26-2007 - 12:19pm
I'm keeping my married name...its funny, my brother assumed I'd go back to my maiden name, and was actually hurt that I wasn't going back. I just think it would be too much of a PITA, too. SS card, driver's license, passport, not to mention explaining to 5 yo DS that Mommy no longer has the same name...no thanks, I'll just keep what I've had for the last 8 years and piss him off, just a little, maybe piss her off too...of course that would just be a bonus.
Good Luck to you!