New here, having dreams about ex

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2007
New here, having dreams about ex
2
Wed, 03-28-2007 - 6:58am

Last year around this time, H and I decided to divorce. Shortly after, I found out I was preggy and I kept the baby. The baby is now 5 months old. H has not called or contacted me since the baby's birth.

For some reason, every now and then, I think about him and wonder what he's doing. I also have dreams where I either meet with him or he comes to see the baby. When this happens, I wake up feeling very sad.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Wed, 03-28-2007 - 9:37pm
I have dreamed of my ex nearly every night in the last two years. He is still so much a part of me. Some of the dreams are nice, but in most I end up broken hearted. I am sorry this is happening to you. Take care of yourself. Hugs, Brenda

Hugs, Brenda 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2007
Thu, 03-29-2007 - 3:41pm

Dreaming is your brains way of processing your thoughts (subconscious)...(i think everyone knows this).

I was dreaming a lot of a reconciliation with my stbx and I'm the one who wanted out. I was having some doubts - mostly b/c of our children and how much I see this affecting them and it kills me. I really weighed my decision and finally came to the conclusion that I was doing the right thing. Once I decided - for certain - that I knew in my heart it was the right thing I quit dreaming about him (for now).

Maybe you need to reach out to him to see if he'd be willing to see his child? You are obviously suffering internally with conflict over wanting him to 'want' to see his own child and possibly begin a relationship with him/her. Either way, if you sit down with yourself and try to figure out what this inner turmoil is that you are feeling maybe that will help ease the dreams a little bit. Maybe you are worried about having a father figure for your child, or maybe you just wish he wanted to be a part of their life. Maybe you just need to have a heart to heart with yourself :) HTH! Either way I hope they ease up b/c I'm sure it's not easy dreaming about it nightly. I know I was suffering greatly from my dreams. Big Hug!