Nit Picking

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
Nit Picking
9
Wed, 04-19-2006 - 1:30pm

It seems like my ex comes back to town nit picking at me. He got 6 days off to stay at his GF's without parenting responsibilities and comes back to have them for one night. I picked them up last night after working 12 hours to his phone call complaining that I shouldn't beep the horn when I pick them up. I CALLED ahead to have them ready and still had to wait. After a 12 hour shift the last thing I want to do is sit out in my car waiting!

So anywhooo, he called me and I hung up on him, he called again and I hung up. He called a THIRD time and I told him to stop calling or I'd have him brought up on harrassment charges. I took the phone off the hook and my daughter and I took the dog outside for some air. When I came back I put the phone back on the hook and noticed that he had left a voicemail. I deleted it!

I'm just so tired of him breezing in and out of town and taunting me with his holier than thou attitude. I'm broke again because OUR daughter needed more medication for her ear infection and it was very expensive, plus she has an unpaid balance on her doctor's bill which I had to make a payment on. He hasn't contributed one cent!!!!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
In reply to: isysmoon
Wed, 04-19-2006 - 1:43pm
My ex does that as well. I learning how to avoid it and not let it get to me. Slowly Im learning. I was exposed to that a bit this morning and I handled much better than I usually do. I too have to remember not to set myself up for it also.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
In reply to: isysmoon
Wed, 04-19-2006 - 2:10pm
Yeah well it'd be nicer if he would just be responsible and SHUT UP. I don't ask much from him except to be on time picking them up and to be a little more understanding about the work schedule and at least ACKNOWLEDGE that I'm trying to be fair and that I'm taking responsiblity for my kids. For some reason he feels like I have no reason to complain when he doesn't help pay for things they NEED, yet he can cruise back into town and diss me for something as stupid as honking for the kids to come out.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
In reply to: isysmoon
Wed, 04-19-2006 - 2:19pm

Girl tell me about it. My ex has no real responsibility either and then when he does come every other weekend and then has the nerve to act as though I do nothing or dont even know how to properly dress our son. Today he asked for him and I nicely agreed, didnt have to but Im trying to show that Im willing to be fair, today isnt even his court appointed day and he still had to put me down about his clothes. I will just try to continue to take the high road and pray he gets it someday.

LOL, we can do it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
In reply to: isysmoon
Wed, 04-19-2006 - 2:32pm
I'm at the point where I'm physically and emotionally exhausted and just want to lay the burden down. My 13-year-old is mad at me because I spoke to her about bugging her little sister and her playdate. She slammed out of the house, told me she hated me and was moving out. I didn't get pulled into it, but basically if she wants to try living with her father full time then have at it. I'm tired of being crapped on after busting my a$$ to provide a home for them. She'll figure it out once she ends up in a different school and has to leave her friends behind.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
In reply to: isysmoon
Wed, 04-19-2006 - 3:54pm
Wow. My son is three so at least I know what Im in store for lol. She doesnt hate you, I hope you know. Goodness at that age you think you know it all. As for her moving out, if she did, then she would for sure see how great she has it with you. The kids just look at us as being hard on them and for the other parent they think it would be a picnic not realizing that if they moved with them there would still be rules to follow. She'll calm down and be okay.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
In reply to: isysmoon
Fri, 04-21-2006 - 8:34am

Fast foward 24 hours and I come home from work to find my daughter and her best friend sitting in front of the computer. She greets me with a request to have said friend spend the night at our house. I told her only if she put away the dishes in the dishwasher, which she immediately did! Interesting how catty little teenage girls are, plus she was PMS'ing.

As for the ex. He showed up late to pick them up Wednesday evening and had to be reminded that he's to pick them up Friday night as it's his weekend. Funny when he gets a day off during their spring break he doesn't spend it with them. He's not working today and spends it over at his GF's house with HER kids. What a loser. It just gets me when he is clearly not doing all he can, yet he can breeze in to town and dump all over me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
In reply to: isysmoon
Fri, 04-21-2006 - 2:34pm
I know it just makes me sick to. All we can do is continue to be the rock in our kids lives. We're strong we can do it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
In reply to: isysmoon
Sat, 04-22-2006 - 9:08am

HUGS!! Ex's AND kids can be REALLY infuritating at times.


I'm glad your daughter calmed down a bit. They really don't realize how much we do for them, and how much it hurts when there's no appreciation. One day, our kids will realize what we've done for them....at least, I hope!




What lies behind us and lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
In reply to: isysmoon
Sat, 04-22-2006 - 3:08pm
Yes my daughter had the nerve to tell her father I was "selfish" for not giving her money. She asked him for it and he said "no" and then she said that I had said no because I was selfish. This is the child that I bought an Ipod Mini for her birthday and the "cool" new sneakers for back to school. It burns my a$$. I take extra call and overtime at work when they are with their father so they can have new stuff and it's still not enough. I'm burned out.