Not coming back here anymore

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-31-2004
Not coming back here anymore
9
Fri, 09-02-2005 - 11:19am
no support .........no soft place to land......I am done.......
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
Fri, 09-02-2005 - 11:49am
Hannahbze03, please don't turn away from the board because of this issue. I can understand that it is hard to read what some people say and take the "advice" they are giving. I know there have been times when I have read responses and thought how could you write that. I ignore those ones. That is all we can do. Everyone sees each situation through her own eyes and experiences and that can give her a very different viewpoint. If you don't agree or you feel attacked, ignore that poster and go on. It seemed to me that several other posters offered support and kind words. Don't let what one poster said taint how you feel about the entire board. Please stick around and read posts and respond or post when you feel comfortable.
neverdull
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Fri, 09-02-2005 - 11:58am

We would love to keep you.....


You offer just as much to the board as anyone else does. I too have read responses that make me cringe, but it doesn't cause me to leave, simply because if my story can help just one person, I am happy. That's what keeps me from blowing up because someone didn't agree with me.


Remember, your story and your feelings are helping someone on this board. It would be a tragedy if you left. Who would that person have to turn to?


Hugs to you and I really hope you will reconsider.


Angelena






iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
Fri, 09-02-2005 - 12:14pm

Hanna,

Please dont leave this board. I think we all have at times had responses to some of our posts that made us want to scream. I know I have gotten some responses that I didnt like at all. But it's okay. When we are hurting its hard to see that even posts that hurt when we first read them may have a hidden message or good point in some way or another. Not everybody is RIGHT. They are just giving their oppinion. Re-read over the posts from your other message. I know I did not put you down at all, and there were others that applauded you too.

I just think some of the posters misunderstood what you meant by letting your six yr old answer the phone. I THINK THAT IS A GOOD IDEA. Hang in there girl. We are here for you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2004
Fri, 09-02-2005 - 2:28pm
After everything you've been through in your life, you're going to let one post run you off?
Sanguine
Avatar for susieyippin
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-07-2003
Sat, 09-03-2005 - 10:52am

EXACTLY. I've gotten responses here that I didn't necessarily WANT to hear, but that I NEEDED to hear.

Good luck to the OP.

Susie Y

EDIT: I just read through the thread in question. There may be one answer that could help. Instead of speaking with the ex on the phone, use email to communicate. If he threatens, then you have a copy that can be printed out. As long as one sticks to the facts/subject, and keeps it as brief as possible, it may eliminate or alleviate a lot of problems.




Edited 9/3/2005 12:00 pm ET ET by susieyippin
Avatar for susieyippin
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-07-2003
Sat, 09-03-2005 - 12:04pm

Please stay, the ladies here are great. I've had some advice that I didn't like, and had misunderstandings, etc., but for the most part, the advice here and the support here has been exemplary. Just like IRL, we may not all get along, and like other posters have said, it's difficult to always see the subtleties one is trying to convey with just words.

Susie Y

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2005
Sat, 09-03-2005 - 12:36pm
I just read your post to find out what this was all about and I have to say I agree with you regarding the phone calls. I too have an ex who has called and harrassed me on a daily basis. I do not answer the phone if he calls, I let the kids do it, 4,6 and 12. He is calling to talk to them after not me "so he says". Anyways, the kids always hand the phone over to me and it is then at that point, I say if this something we need to discuss about the kids, fine, if not, I have nothing to say. I will no longer listen to him belittle me or harass me. I see nothing worng with the way you are doing things,hang in there! There is A LOT of support here!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Sat, 09-03-2005 - 1:30pm

hi hannah.


of course, it is your decision and we will all respect it.


but, i truly hope you will reconsider.


to be honest - i don't know what i would have done, how i would've gotten thru my separation and divorce without this board. the people here held my hand, gave me a shoulder to cry on, supported me. did i sometimes get advice that i didn't like? probably. but isn't that the way it is with friends? yes, it is. true friends will tell you 'like it is'. some people sugar-coat, some people pat you on the back, and some people are just honest. I remember that when i was going thru my divorce i was soooooo angry/frustrated/nervous - i felt like a pot about to boil over. and no matter what someone said to me - even if people were being nice, i was always on the verge of tears. but - that passed.


hugs hannah.


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Sat, 09-03-2005 - 1:47pm
Hannah, I wish you wouldn't go. Don't let a few upsetting comments make you leave.