PLEASE HELP!!!
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PLEASE HELP!!!
| Tue, 03-29-2005 - 8:54pm |
I am about to file for a divorce from my husband who is in the Army. Because I am over 3600 miles from home I can not afford to move back. I always thought the Army would pay for us to go home but they normally dont. Does anyone know of anyway I can get the Army to pay for the move. I have to get away from here. He does not beat me or anything of that nature... I dont want to list the reasons but if anyone can help it would be greatly appriecated. Thank you in advance...

I think you might be able to get some better advice from people on this board if you provided some additional details. I understand that you don't want to put your life on the internet, but in order for others to give you advice, more info might help.
You said your husband is in the Army, and you are 3600 miles from home. Are you in the Army also? Are you currently outside of the US? What about your own family? Is there anyone in the states that can help you? Are there kids involved? You said "I always thought the Army would pay for "us" to go home"....are you saying that the both of you are trying to get home? Are you both in agreement about getting divorced?
I'm not trying to pry, just to get a better idea of your situation. I don't know anything about the Army. Have you looked into what kind of assistance, if any, the Army provides for situations like this? Or are you just looking for support/answers from friendly strangers?
Try to give us more, and we'll see if we can help.
Good Luck.
suzq
I agree with suzq. If you could provide just a little more info, people would probably be able to help better.
My Ex was in the USMC when we first married, and I lived with him on base (over 2000 miles from home) during part of our marriage. When he was sent to Iraq, I had to go home by myself. I thought that the military would help pay for the move back to, but there was some type of loop hole, and I had to find the money to go home on my own. Your situation seems to be different, so there may be other types of military assistance that can be provided to you.
Go talk to some people where you are two are stationed. I'm not sure what it is called, but the military has an entire department dedicated to sending members back home, whether they are being discharged or being relocated. I'm sure there is some type of way that they can help you. Just hope for the best, and take it in stride. The military works at its own pace, not anyone elses. It can be frustrating, especially if your circumstances need immediate attention.
Best of Luck!
Kait
I am so sorry, guess it was sort of cryptic.. My H is a cheater. not just a once in awhile thing but he thinks he is 18 again. I dont fault him that is what he must need to feel good, lots of "friends." There are improper relationships and all the lies. Please dont anyone tell me the military cares about adultery. It is everywhere and no one does anything. I just need everything to be done. I need to move on this has dragged out for almost two years. We moved out west to "start over" half way out here I heard the messages from the first girl. I did all the things I was suppossed to do. I held up my end. Alot of the problems are both our faults but it has to stop, it is not healthy.
We have 3 children. Two bio and my brother with severe mental issues. H has been in almost ten years. I am entitled to 22.5% of the retirement. I stayed home for 6 years to take care of the kids. I worked from the day I was 16 until we had kids, all my job references are crap because they are so old. I got a temp job in Sept and worked really hard to get to a good place. He was deplyed a year, talked to the kids maybe four times. He comes over to see them but he comes to see me as well. This is a game to him. Everyone falls in love with him blah blah blah.. Tonight I told him I was done with us.. So he starts talking about joint custody. I think he is under the impression if he gets joint custody he will pay less. He has been in country 6 months out of over 3 years. He lives in the barracks now, only can visit with the kids here. I wont keep the kids from him. He is doing this to have the upper hand.
I am not angry I am worried about how this will affect the kids and me. I cant be a good mother when I am so stressed out. It is not good for him to be in and out of the house the way he is. It is time I respect myself. Marriage to me is a life long commitment, that is why I hung around waiting for the changes. I am in the US. He will never leave the Army. He cant possibly think he will see them 50% of the time. He knows nothing about medical and school issues. He might be threatening me with joint custody so I file, then when he tells the girlfriends I threw him out it will be believable. He told me that is what he told one. This is all a game to him. The thought of him taking the kids scares me. I am the one that made sure they remembered him. I am the one that potty trained and kissed all the boo-boos when he did not even call. So this got long but I swear this is the short version.
Oh well...