Please Help... not sure

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-22-2008
Please Help... not sure
3
Tue, 01-22-2008 - 10:48pm

I need advice.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Tue, 01-22-2008 - 11:13pm

How much is too much? You've hit that already.


No one is not a "true alcholic" ... you are ... or you arent. I think you need to face reality that he IS. & dragging YOURSELF down into his addiction isnt going to help anyone.


As for the way he treats you, thats emotional & verbal abuse. & you support the 2 of you?

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2008
Wed, 01-23-2008 - 10:04am

So this sounds just like my story that I am going through right now. I have been married 2.5 years but we have a 2 year old son instead of a home. My husband drinks alot also and I choose not to. I totally understand what you are going through! You have to do what is best for you, that is what I have decided. I have been walked on enough! Keep your head up and do whats right for you... congrats on your weight lose also! I am working on that also!


Here for you!


Sirena3245

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2006
Thu, 01-24-2008 - 10:19am

Notsure,


For starters, stop being his drinking buddy. You aren't helping him...or you. Indeed you are enabling him to keep drinking which is exactly what he wants to do. So stop "helping" him be a drunk. Have some resolve here.


Secondly, his "perfectionism" is just another name for "control freak." He's trying to control you, hence, the sabatoge of your weight loss, the drinking, the competition between you over what you earn vs. what he earns. It's classic passive-aggressive behavior.


Here's the bottom line: you can't control him and he can't control you (unless you let him). You can only control your reaction and response.


Time for a plan and you've gotten a head start. A)You're taking charge of your weight. B)You earn enough to support yourself. C)Choosing not

CL-Wisdomtooth2020